


Why'd you only call me when you're high ?

by Cursedhurricane



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Fluff, M/M, Romance, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-08-30
Packaged: 2019-11-07 15:19:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 24,671
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17963042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cursedhurricane/pseuds/Cursedhurricane
Summary: Baekhyun's coveted by a chaebol heir who only knows him when he's under the spell of psychotropic drugs.





	1. Chapter 1

 

Chanyeol could swear he just saw his silhouette walking out of the club in a tight pair of skinny jeans and his arm around a short guy with blonde hair.  
He could have dreamt about it yeah but their eyes met and it was enough of a proof.  
What if the artificial fog of the club produced illusions?  
Chanyeol wondered then, maybe he was just alone in his room and his mind was going at it again.

“What are you looking at?”

Jongin’s shouts make him scrunch his face. His dark circles look like two cups of coffee from above and Chanyeol frowns.

“Nothing. Should we get started? The alcohol isn’t enough.”

He follows Jongin through the bodies here and there and they stand beside a long draped white curtain. What awaits behind is the promise of his own decadence through the night, his sweet guilty pleasure to wash away the daily struggles, the daily reminders that he’s not good enough.  


\--

Loud knocks.  
The hot body sliding against his stops. The knocks are getting louder. Louder. And someone says his name.  
Loudly.  
Louder.  
Baekhyun wakes up, drenched in sweat with a tent-like blanket. He looks around, then at his alarm clock and it’s 6:14am. He curses and hears once again the knocks coming from the entrance followed by the doorbell shortly after. He leaves his bed and goes up to the door, a bit scared. He grabs his porcelain vase, a souvenir from Japan, and asks suspiciously who’s disturbing his sleep – and a very hot dream with Seo Kang Joon – at such an ungodly hour.  
He looks through the peephole and sighs.

“Baekhyun!”

Baekhyun frowns, his button nose scrunching up as he realizes that Jongin's best friend is here in the middle of the night for only God knows the reason why.

“Oh my God, Chanyeol go home.”

There’s a sound against the door, as if Chanyeol had just bumped against it.

“Please Baekhyun…I can’t. I typed the passcode a hundred times but it won't open”

“Just go to Jongin's.”

Chanyeol leans against the door, beyond wasted. He couldn't even remember how he made it to Baekhyun's apartment, if he took a taxi or walked there from the club.

“Jongin's gone with Taemin, I'm sure they're having sex right now.”

Baekhyun shakes his head, his eyes falling on the porcelain vase he's still holding, suddenly aware that whoever he thought was trying to trespass his home he was going to smash their heads with his most precious possession.

“Baekhyun please, I beg you, open your door, I'm not leaving if you don't.”  
  
Baekhyun stays beside his door, still holding his vase like there’s no tomorrow, pondering whether or not he should let Chanyeol in. The other sounds drunk like a fish and Baekhyun doesn’t want to wake up the whole building if Chanyeol keeps whining loudly like this.

“Just for tonight!”

He carefully unlocks his door and when he opens it he doesn’t expect Chanyeol to rush into his arms, reeking of alcohol so much that it makes him want to throw up.

“Baekhyun!” Chanyeol grins from ear to ear as Baekhyun juggles between his precious vase and Chanyeol's heavy body. He sets down the vase on the buffet in the entrance and guides Chanyeol through his living-room after struggling with him to help him remove his shoes.  
They sit together on the sofa and Chanyeol giggles like a school girl, pokes Baekhyun’s cheek and this one suddenly can’t quite fathom why he allowed him in.

“Cute.”

Baekhyun sighs. “Are out of your mind?”

Chanyeol closes his eyes, holding Baekhyun’s hand suddenly. “You have no idea.”

“Where have you been?”

“That club called SM.”

Baekhyun crosses his arms and glares at Chanyeol but he's too busy looking at his carpet with a deep interest. “How did you get inside? Did you follow me?”

Chanyeol only smiles. “I saw you and that dude. Who’s this? Is he your boyfriend?”

Baekhyun shakes his head. “Chanyeol, it’s not the point right now.”

“Why are you annoyed at me ?”  
  
His smile fades away. Baekhyun sighs, defeated. He doesn't know why Chanyeol choose to come here because they weren't even friends in the first place. Chanyeol was only Jongin's best friend and they did meet at that party a little more than a year ago to celebrate Jongin's birthday but that was it. Everytime they had seen each other, the taller would barely talk to him, only greeting him hello and goodbye.  
Baekhyun did try to start conversations a couple times but Chanyeol would give a one word reply or cut it short and excuse himself. It was offending the first times for Baekhyun but after a while he dismissed it. Chanyeol came to his apartment once with Jongin, that day Baekhyun needed help to bring in his new fridge and when he proposed that they stayed over for chicken and beers only Jongin accepted and Chanyeol had flown through the door faster than light.  
That's it, Chanyeol is a shooting star. When you thought you've seen it, you weren't even sure because it was already gone. And the last thing Baekhyun imagined when he went to bed three hours ago was that a shooting star would crash in his living-room against his shoulder, knocked out.

“What did I do in my previous life to deserve this?”

He rubs his slender fingers on his face, too tired to cope with a giant drunken man. He wonders if he could even drag him into his room but the thought discourages him all in a span of a few seconds. He didn't want Chanyeol to sleep on the brand new sofa in case he'd empty his guts there so he had to wake him up.

“Chanyeol ! Park Chanyeol !”

A moan. He shakes him up a little harder.

“Chanyeol please wake up !”

Baekhyun freezes when the other grabs him by the waist.

“CHANYEOL !”

The latter jolts awake, his half lidded eyes focusing on Baekhyun finally. “ I was sleeping so well.”

Baekhyun scoffs, “Were you? Guess who disturbed me at 6am when I was having a really nice dream ?”

Chanyeol leans his head against the sofa with a grunt, completely ignoring his host and at that Baekhyun punches his arm. “Ouch!”

“Get your ass up, go wash up.”

Chanyeol whines, “My head is spinning and my ears are buzzing. And I can see white sparks everywhere. ”  
He takes a deep breath, pulling on his tee-shirt. Baekhyun can see the thin layer of sweat on his forehead.

“Why is it so hot here?”

“Chanyeol it's not even hot these days, it's almost november.”

He observes and doesn't remember putting away Chanyeol's jacket in the entrance. “Did you come here only in a tee-shirt?”

Chanyeol doesn't open his eyes, still trying to recover from the heat wave that hit him. “Yeah why ?”

“Are you crazy ?! Do you want to die of pneumonia ?”

He finally looks, his dark locks falling on his forehead, an impish smile decorating his face.

“That would be great.”

Baekhyun doesn't want to focus on that. Chanyeol's weird tonight, _Hell_ he wasn't even Chanyeol himself to begin with. He is an impostor, a fraud. He's weird, speaks too much when he's usually as silent as a grave. Baekhyun doesn't know exuberant Park Chanyeol who's drunk, touchy, loud with a tiny bit of morbid jokes.  
He isn't a therapist and certainly not to a guy he barely knows and has to meet occasionnaly because they have a common friend.

“How much did you drink ?”

Chanyeol leans his head against the sofa's headrest, eyes only for his host. “I don't remember but I had something else.”

Baekhyun shakes his head, hopeless. “You rich kids really don't know how to have fun without all the shit you take.”

Chanyeol doesn't reply. There's so much he wants to say but he can't because it spins and he reaches out for Baekhyun's hand to keep himself grounded but it's not enough. He feels like crying, overwhelmed by the effects and maybe, maybe it's the comedown but it hasn't been that long since he took...  
He shivers and Baekhyun sees.

“Come on Chanyeol, I need you to cooperate with me now, ok?”

His voice is gentle and it caresses Chanyeol's skin like a fresh breeze. He puts his arms over Baekhun's shoulder and walks with him to the bathroom. He's sit down on the closed toilet seat and he's ordered to stay still. Chanyeol laughs. “Am I a dog or something?”  
Baekhyun shakes his head, wets a washcloth with warm water and settles in front of Chanyeol who had closed his eyes in the meantime.  
The warm hand on his arm wakes him up and sends shivers down his spine.  
And he watches Baehyun gently scrub every inch of skin, his hands, his arms, his neck.  
It tickles on his ears and he suddenly leans his head against his shoulder to stop Baekhyun's attacks with a laugh, eyes closed, like a kid. Baekhyun finds himself smiling.  
He tries to clean his left ear now but again Chanyeol dodges and giggles louder this time.

“Alright then.”

Baekhyun finally reaches for his face, holding his chin in place. Chanyeol opens his eyes and stares at him. He doesn't know if he's distracted by the soft wet cloth on his cheek or if it's Baekhyun's face.  
Or both.  
He studies him like a painter. The canvas unfolds and Chanyeol reaches out for his brush to paint.  
Baekhyun's cute button nose he wants to boop, Baekhyun's droopy eyes turning into crescents whenever he smiles, Baekhyun's perfectly shaped lips he wants to kiss.  
His warm breath ghosts over his mouth. It doesn't smell bad but it doesn't smell good either. It's not a morning breath he'd hate, he finds himself thinking that he could kiss Baekhyun with tongue and all if he could.  
He has to close his eyes as the washcloth slides against his eyelids, obstructing the tiny lip mole he just discovered.  
Chanyeol feels like Christopher Columbus and Baekhyun is his unexplored land. _There it is._  
He sees more moles, on the chin, on the cheek, on his collarbone, his tee-shirt hanging low...On his temple even.  
Why is Baekhyun's body full of constellations, he wonders.  
And why does Chanyeol feels like a backhole ?

“Done!”

Chanyeol raises his head now that Baekhyun is gone to wash the cloth and he feels sad.  
Unbearably sad.

“I might have a large size top for you, wait for me here.”

He's gone and Chanyeol purses his lips, swallowing the tears. He can't cry, he can't let him see.  
_Breathe, breathe, breathe..._  
His stare for his hands, he looks at the faint bruise near his wrist and wonders how it happened. He fell at one point, in the club or on the way to Baekhyun's ?

“Chanyeol I'm sorry but I only have that. I still haven't moved all my clothes here.”

When he looks he sees Baekhyun holding out a white tee-shirt with Sailor Moon on the front. And he laughs, heartily and it chases away the need to cry, and the tears die down on his cheeks as he bents forward and holds his stomach from laughing so much.

“A- Are you serious Byun Baekhyun?”

Baekhyun shows a goofy smile, he expected that much. “Hell I am. You are wearing that.”

“You're a Sailor Moon fan? Really?”

He's a little offended. “So what ? I need to be a girl to appreciate that?”

Chanyeol shakes his head negatively. “Are you in love with Tuxedo Mask ?”

Baekhyun grins and hands the tee-shirt to Chanyeol, ignoring the question. “I'm taking pictures of you wearing that and I'll show Jongin tomorrow.”

Chanyeol strips, tosses his top on the floor and laughs, displaying the round of abs he earned painfully with the impossible hours he spent at the gym and Baekhyun tries not to look too much. He didn't know Chanyeol was so well built. He can still feel his firm and defined arm muscles under the washcloth.

“So that's your ideal type? Tall ? Dark hair ? Mysterious ?”

And with a last brushstroke, Chanyeol doesn't realize he's painting himself.

“Can I call you Usagi now?”  
  
Baekhyun chuckles. “Chanyeol if you don't stop making fun of me I swear in the name of the moon I'll punish you.”

As Baekhyun poses like Usagi Chanyeol doesn't stop cackling and Baekhyun finds himself chuckling because the giant in his bathroom is less gloomy and his clouded eyes from the high seem to light up just a little.

“Come on Sailor Soldier, it's 7am now and I need my beauty sleep.”

Chanyeol complies and doesn't say a word when Baekhyun prepares the bed for him, left messy because he woke up startled earlier. He strips down from his jeans as Baekhyun arranges the pillow and the blankets properly.  
He turns around, startled by the sight of Chanyeol's milky thighs and looks up straight into his eyes, a little embarrassed. “You can sleep now, I changed my sheets yesterday...Well if that's ok with you.”  
The other only nods in response.  
Baekhyun is beaten. In a span of six months, he had never been able to talk or share this much with Chanyeol but now he has even seen him almost naked. The leap was phenomenal.  
He cares to put a large bowl beside the bed in case Chanyeol needs to throw up and finally turns back.

“Try to sleep Chanyeol, you have horrible bags under your eyes.”

But the taller prevents him from exiting the room. “Where are you going ?”

Baekhyun can't help but to take a step back, surprised. “In the living-room, I'll sleep on the sofa.”

“It's your bedroom.”

“Well thanks Captain Obvious.”

Chanyeol shakes his head, “I don't steal beds Baekhyun.”

He really wants to sigh but he can't bring himself to sound annoyed, it will pain Chanyeol again. “I'm doing you a favor.”

Chanyeol fidgets, his eyes on the hem of the Sailor Moon t-shirt he's wearing. “Why ? We're not even friends.”  
  
Baekhyun wants to ask, _Then why are you even here ?_

He whinces as Baekhyun slaps his head. “Don't friends help each other when they're drunk ? You're my friend now Chanyeol, I've never done that for Jongdae but you're a friend now.”

Chanyeol finds himself grinning like an idiot and like a mirror Baekhyun shows the same expression. He feels special tonight, loved and cared for. He doesn't know if it's the alcohol, the drugs or Baekhyun's smile that do that to his insides, it's upside down, it tickles, it burns.  
He's high.  
Higher than ever.

And he wraps his arms around Baekhyun, a little too strong but he holds him in place so he doesn't stumble and Baekhyun gasps, at first in a daze but he ends up hugging the giant back because he needs it and he doesn't have the heart to reject him.  
“Your hair smells like bananas.”

Baekhyun laughs against Chanyeol. “Ah yes it's my night hair mask. You know since i've bleached my hair I need to do that so it stays healthy.”

Chanyeol isn't really listening, breathing in like a junkie high on his dose.

“Come on cuddly boy, let's sleep now.”

Reluctantly, he lets go and finds himself put to bed by Baekhyun who keeps smiling at him. He doesn't want to sleep alone, he needs warmth, something to help him fight the longing inside. Chanyeol can't feel whole. He's missing pieces of who he used to be and he doesn't know when it happened. It struck him one day, like a disease.  
He reaches for his arm before he turns around and leaves. “Stay with me.”

Baekhyun frowns. “What's wrong Chanyeol ?”

“Please stay. I don't want to be alone during the comedown... I don't want to be alone.”

Baekhyun hesitates. He hadn't planned being a baby-sitter tonight. Or today, it was dawn already. The lack of sleep is killing him, he feels like he's in a vivid dream and he will wake up soon alone in bed. But it's real, it's real when they slip under the blankets and he feels Chanyeol closer, his warm breath blowing on his left ear.  
He holds his breath but as the other is respecting his space, he finally exhales.  
_How am I supposed to sleep now ?_  
He wonders.  
When he thinks that Chanyeol is finally knocked out, Baekhyun succumbs too, tiredness wining over him and his thoughts.  
He wakes up four hours later to the sound of someone gagging.  
He finds Chanyeol emptying his stomach in the toilet bowl, gripping it like it would fly away, his face pale, he witnesses his pain. He crouches, reaches for his muscular and wide back and strokes in circular motions to offer some tangible support.  
Chanyeol keeps throwing up and as soon as he leans back a little, there's a new gushing wave of poison released and Baekhyun wonders just how much he drank tonight.  
When he's done, he leans against the bowl breathless, his hair a mess, his mouth burning and his limbs weak.

“Chanyeol are you alright ?”

He nods and closes his eyes.

“Do you want a glass of water now ?”

“No...It will come back.” His voice is hoarse, bruised by the acids.

Baekhyun stays by his side, stares at the mess of a human he's got for companion today. He's been trying to read Chanyeol countless times but he can't understand him. He only knows that Jongin's his childhood best friend, that his father is the CEO and chairman of Park Group, one of the largest conglomerates in South Korea. Jongin's father owns one of the companies of Park Group called P&K Corporation, one of the “Big Three” IT services in South Korea. It's the third largest conglomerate of the country and both Chanyeol and Jongin work in the Communication and New Media department as IT consultants.  
Chanyeol had to study in New York for over a year and that's when Baekhyun and Jongin met as the latter came to his company one day to work on their social media image.  
He kept coming for a while and naturally Jongin and him had bonded over Lay Zhang, a really popular Chinese artist as they were scrolling on the instagram page of Baekhyun's company.  
Lay had signed a contract to represent their latest clothing line and Jongin had beamed, sincerely praising the man's charisma on stage and his killer dance moves. That's when he confessed to Baekhyun that he was a dancer himself, that he did ballet when he was younger and it was without a doubt that they found themselves around a glass of cold beer and freshly fried chicken to get to know each other more.  
At first Baekhyun was scared because the maknae sure was handsome but he didn't want to get involved with anyone he worked with. So he didn't really know if sometimes the younger was flirting or not and what blew away his worries came in the form of an androgynous and gorgeous man standing near their table, one night, in a club, and who had kissed Jongin mercilessly, introducing himself as his boyfriend.  
Lee Taemin.  
That very Lee Taemin, the ace of Shinee Entertainment.  
Naturally Baekhyun had excused himself after that and he wasn't even surprised to see them making out while he was leaving the VIP lounge of the SM club.  
But Chanyeol ? Chanyeol came later on, during Jongin's birthday party as he was freshly back from the Big Apple, been offered a regular position in Jongin's team. He had been a training consultant for Google LLC in New York, had impressively improved his english and could know show some credit in the IT Services his father's company could offer. Baekhyun was impressed to hear the man tell a hundred interesting stories about his life in the US and Jongin had to cut his enthusiasm because Baekhyun was standing there silently like Harry Potter had lent him his invisible cloak.  
Baekhyun remembers Chanyeol's rounded eyes as he finally noticed him, he didn't know if it was out of embarrassment or shyness but he kept adverting his eyes. Chanyeol and him had been introduced by the birthday boy himself who jokingly suggested they should date because they were both single and probably sexually frustrated. At that, Taemin added that they would go on couple dates, the four of them. Jongin added another layer, that he didn't know if Baekhyun hyung had a liking for men but that for sure it was Chanyeol's hyung cup of tea.  
Baekhyun almost choked on his champagne and Chanyeol's ears had turned crimson. Since that day, the time they first met, Chanyeol had never opened up to Baekhyun and he would never initiate a conversation. During lunch breaks when Jongin invited Baekhyun, Chanyeol was the wallflower, barely talking, swallowing up his food and departing as soon as possible, pretending that he had a pile of work to take care of.  
Baekhyun even thought that the man hated his guts and he couldn't even comprehend why. He's always been considerate of Chanyeol, he always makes sure he doesn't feel left out and everytime he invites Jongin over for dinner, he asks the giant to come.  
But everytime Chanyeol refuses.  
So if Chanyeol is here now, it means that he doesn't hate him, right ?  
A glance at his pale face confirms that the man is having the worst time of his life but he says nothing, he's sitting there against the cold tiles of his bathroom wall, in the Sailor Moon top and his briefs, shivering like a forlorn leaf on a branch during a cold autumn night. He isn't talking, he's spacing out, waiting for the evil that struck him to leave his body.  
He isn't looking at Baekhyun, his eyes are shifting everywhere but on him.  
He can't grasp who he really is.  
_Who are you Chanyeol ?_  
For now, he's a broken soul pouring out his refrained emotions into a toilet bowl.

“What are you doing to yourself Chanyeol ?”

The reply comes in the form of bile, burning up his entire insides, his throat, his mouth and the tears fall and Chanyeol knows the feeling of emptiness is back as he unloads the last bits.  
He's disgusted with himself. He hates that Baekhyun sees it all.  
He cries because it hurts. He can't help it. And he realizes, he's crashing, _Ah, it's happening now, at last._

And it's between his arms that he cries best he thinks. It's both comforting and overwhelming, he can't choose. Baekhyun is humming a song and it crushes Chanyeol's heart into pieces before coating it up and making it whole again.  
It's bittersweet.  
He's stroking his hair gently, rocking back and forth like a mother with her child.  
It's all Chanyeol needs.  
“Why is it always terrible when the happiness's gone ?”  
The sobs choke him up.  
Baekhyun knows what he means. “Because you relied on artificial happiness Chanyeol. It's a poison and your body is cleansing itself out.”

“How do you know ?”

Baekhyun grins down at him. “Who took care of Jongin when you weren't there ?”

 

 

It's 5pm when Chanyeol finally wakes up, warm in Baekhyun's bed, the smell of his detergent sweet and addicting. It's like he slept on a bed of peonies. It gives him a little comfort because he can't ignore the dark clouds over his head, his mood is terrible and he recalls everything that happened hours ago with shame.  
He's alone, the door is closed and there's a glass of juice and painkillers on the nightstand with a note.

 _Drink it up when you wake up,_  
_you need to replenish and_  
_give your body vitamins :))_

He sighs, stands up and makes the bed a little slow, his whole body aches. He drinks the juice, puts back his jeans and finds his wallet and his cellphone in the pockets. There's 10 missed calls from Jongin and more texts messages.  
He'll deal with him later. He doesn't even check his appearance in the mirror, he can swear right away that he looks like death but it doesn't stop him from opening the door and show his face to his savior of the night.  
Baekhyun was so startled he let go of the sandwich he's holding, sitting on the high chair of his kitchen counter. “You're awake !”

He comes down and grabs a plate from the microwave and puts it across himself. “Come here, I just made sandwiches.”  
He pauses, takes a quick look at the clock and smiles. “Ah maybe we should order in, it's dinner time soon.”

He giggles and Chanyeol stares. He's wrapped in a burgundy bathrobe, wears his glasses perched on his button nose and pours juice in a glass then stops himself with a gasp. “You probably want coffee ?”

Chanyeol sighs.  
“I'm gonna leave. Thank you for everything.”

Baekhyun is speechless for few seconds, his mind in the middle of processing that Chanyeol wants to depart and finally he quickly follows after him, blocking the access to the door by extending his arms and legs.

“You're not going anywhere. You need food, I even cut some fruits cutely so it cheers you up !”

Chanyeol closes his eyes, it's suffocating. “I want to leave Baekhyun.”

“Why suddenly ?”

Internally Baekhyun was laughing at himself, how hours ago he didn't want to let Chanyeol in and now he didn't want him to leave. What kind of turnaround was it ?

“I want to take a shower and sleep.”

“You can do that here ! Do you remember the code of your place now ?”

 _I never forgot_ , he'd like to say. But he doesn't.

“I do. Now can I go Baekhyun ?”

It's the fact that he sounds so nonchalant and irritated that makes Baekhyun surrender. Usually he's on to put up a fight and stubbornly insist when it comes to one's well being but he wonders if he has any right to do so when the man in front of him took drugs and drank all night long, flirting with his own limits everytime he was out and about. He couldn't really tell if Jongin was the bad influence or if Chanyeol was the evil one in the story.  
He only knows that evey rich heirs around his friends were the same, addicted to all types of drugs, wasted almost every night and Baekhyun wonders what do they want to forget so badly by intoxicating themselves on a daily basis ?  
Baekhyun blesses his life, his parents earned just enough for them to survive and it seems being rich comes with all sort of vices and he's sure he'd rather be poor than have any of them.

“You could stay, it's sunday...”

Chanyeol wants to refuse once more but Baekhyun beats him to it. “Alright Chanyeol, just text me you made it home ok ? And take my jacket, it's cold outside, you're not going out like that again.”

He's given an oversize black bomber jacket, it seems warm enough. He quietly mumbles his gratitude and he's out without even sparing a glance at Baekhyun's troubled face.  
There's nothing to say anyway, he saw him in the worst state possible and he woke up feeling like a burden. He needed to get out also because he was too tempted to stay.  
Baekhyun's universe was affecting him, the light's too bright and he can feel himself covered in cosmic dust. He's deprived of an atmosphere and the beams of light radiating from Baekhyun are blinding him, burning his skin, blisters on his heart.  
_I'm scorched, a badly burned patient._  
Chanyeol wonders why every single passerby is looking at him with a smile, some even laughs and he gets it when a little girl is pointing at his chest.  
_Sailor Moon._  
Damn Byun Baekhyun.

 

\--

 

“Have you heard of him ?”

Baekhyun reaches out for Chanyeol's t-shirt on his bathroom floor, his phone trapped between his ear and his shoulder.

“No hyung, not after he told me he was home. Why ?”

“I'm just a little worried, he was crashing.”

Jongin chuckles. “Don't worry, Chanyeol hyung is a big boy, he can handle it.”

Baekhyun stays mute because Jongin didn't see the sadness in his dark orbs.

“I'm picking him up for work tomorrow, he's probably sleeping it off.”

“Ok Jongin, take care.”

 

\--

 

It's a week later when it happens again.

When he opens the door, Chanyeol is here, drunk and handsome.  
He wears Baekhyun's bomber jacket, his hair disheveled and the smell of his cologne hit up Baekhyun's nostrils seducingly.  
He doesn't really talk, he doesn't know what to say and certainly not ask why he came here again of all places. Baekhyun takes it as a need from Chanyeol and he isn't heartless enough to refuse.  
When Chanyeol snuggles up to his warmth, Baekhyun gives him space.  
He leaves a snoring Chanyeol on his bed and ends up curling up on his sofa, his head full of questions he knows Chanyeol would ignore.

When he wakes up in the morning, the sun rising higher, there's a duvet on his body and Chanyeol's gone.

 

 

He comes back the next saturday, this time he's distant and withdrawn, he still talks to Baekhyun though and tells him about his life in New York, that he used to jog around Central Park like in the movies. He wants to bring Baekhyun there and be his tour guide, show him where they can eat the best burgers and climb on top of the Empire State Building to marvel at the view.  
He felt lonely a lot there but he was happy nonetheless because his every days were full of adventures, he was an explorer in a foreign land.  
Baekhyun asks if he's happy in Seoul but Chanyeol shrugs and doesn't reply. He falls asleep on the sofa and he wakes up an hour later from a nightmare, startling Baekhyun who had dozed off too. He excuses himself and after expressing his gratitude for having him over he leaves as the sun starts to rise in the horizon.

 

 

The next time it's during the weekday. Four days after his last impromptu visit.  
It's wednesday.  
Baekhyun is about to go to bed, it's already 11pm and he had been reviewing fashions shows to find some inspiration for their next collection. He is drinking a glass of water in his kitchen when he hears the knocks.  
Somehow he knew.  
It's Park Chanyeol, again.  
He's working tomorrow, he doesn't have time for this. He can't play nurse all the time for someone too broken. But he still opens his door for him and this time Chanyeol isn't smiling and he stands there in the entryway, he doesn't remove his shoes, his gaze lingers on Baekhyun.  
He can smell soju from his breath and as if Chanyeol reads his mind...

“I didn't take anything. I only drank.”

“Where's Jongin ?”

“I was by myself.”

Baekhyun shakes his head, “You even drink in the middle of the week now ?”

“I needed a reason.”

“A reason for what ?”

Chanyeol doesn't say anything, he takes a deep breath, he looks at his shoes. There's the step to reach the floor from where Baekhyun is standing in his slippers and he wonders how many inches he gains from this. Because he's at a perfect angle and he won't have to bend down to...  
Kiss him.  
Chanyeol's kissing him.  
The front of his shoes kicked against the step and he might have crashed a little too agressively on Baekhyun's lips but what worries him is the fact that the other is frozen.  
They look at each other when Chanyeol pulls away. What kind of stupid korean drama kiss was it ? Chanyeol didn't imagine that at all. Baekhyun's lips are soft. He tastes like strawberry toothpaste. It's a relief, Chanyeol hates mint toothpaste.  
It was too short, frigid and cold.  
Nothing like Baekhyun.  
He wants more. Chanyeol ignores the confused look he sees on his face, he reaches for Baekhyun's cheeks, he strokes delicately in adoration and he doesn't notice the shivers but he still closes up the distance once more and moves his moist lips against his.  
Then there's Baekhyun's warm palms on the back of his hands and Chanyeol's convinced he's going to push him away but his mouth finally speaks the same language. They're moving against his, firmly, confidently. They part a few times only to kiss with more viguor, more urgency...  
Their lips are molding each other, coated with saliva as their tongues meet playfully.  
It gradually heats up, the tongues messy and Chanyeol grabs Baekhyun by the waist, crashes their bodies together.  
Baekhyun's thin fingers messes up his hair and Chanyeol can't help stroking his back, then lower, engulfing the smaller in his embrace.

From a frenzy to a slow waltz, they finally part.  
Resting his forehead against his, his hands exploring his neck.  
Baekhyun's mouth is swollen and Chanyeol wants more, more and more.  
But Baekhyun shines too bright.

They share a last kiss and Baekhyun doesn't understand why Chanyeol whispered _Good Night_ against his lips and left him like that, in front of his entryway with the door closed to his face like he didn't kiss his very soul.

 

\--

 

His phone is ringing in the middle of the night.  
Baekhyun swears and with an eye he looks at the caller's ID. “Fucking fuck !”  
He takes the call anyway, his heart is already a mess.

“What do you want ?”

He's laughing at the other end of the line, there's muffled music in the background. He must be outside the club, thinks Baekhyun.

“I wanted to hear your voice Baekhyunnie.”

He's a little surprised by the endearing way he's calling him.

“Chanyeol I was sleeping.” He doesn't ask why he left after the kisses.

“You should come here and have fun with me !”

“I can't, I'm working tomorrow.”

Chanyeol whines. “I'm working too, come on we won't stay for too long.”

He sighs, this is going to be even more tiring than it already is. “Chanyeol, you work with Jongin at his father's company while I don't have the luxury to be offered jobs by my father's string-pulling. So if I don't make it to work tomorrow, no one is going to save my ass.”

“But I want to drink with you !”

“I'm not drinking when I have work the day after.”

“You're no fun Baekhyun.”

“Right. Good night Chanyeol.”  
  
He ends the call abruptly. _I don't have time for this._  
But Chanyeol calls again multiple times and Baekhyun is forced to put his phone on silent mode if he wants to go back to sleep. He's scared the other might come later and kiss the shit out of him again.  
He ends up tossing and turning for the rest of the night.

 

\--

 

“Kim Jongdae !”

He laughs, the upper corner of his lips rise cutely. “Why ? You can share a little!”

Baekhyun glares at him as his best friend had voluntarily taken a generous scoop of ice cream from his bucket. “You said you hated the strawberry cheesecake one !”

Jongdae can't speak, his mouth full and he only chokes a laugh against the back of his hand, scared of spilling some on Baekhyun's precious brand new sofa. He quickly protects his own ice cream bucket – cookie dough flavored – and stands up as his friends tries to hit him with a cushion.

“You should thank me because I spared you some calories.”

“Stop being a kid and come back here you're missing half of the movie.”

They both settle back comfortably, eyes glued to the screen, ice cream as a guilty pleasure to wash away all the stress accumulated through the week. It's the best part of their friday night and nothing can spoil the mood.  
Nothing but the leech that is Park Chanyeol.  
Baekhyun's phone rings loudly, interrupting their movie. Jongdae can read his name on the lit up screen and grimaces. “Him again ?”  
Baekhyun sighs, rejects the call and tosses his phone farther on the sofa. “It's not even midnight and he's already wasted.”

“How do you know ?”

Baekhyun snickers. “He texted. It's a load of gibberish.”

“I guess your lips enchanted him Baek.”

“God, I don't even know why I kissed him back. It's not like I like him.”

“You need to get laid.” Jongdae laughs as Baekhyun glares at him.

Later when the movie's over, their buckets half eaten and their bodies warm under the covers, Baekhyun finally unlocks his phone and sees for himself that Chanyeol hadn't stopped calling him or texting him.  
The last text message makes him feel guilty.

_Whyyy ar u ignoring me ???????  
u regret beiing my friend rite ??_

A friend ? Who makes out with their friend ?  
He types a reply quickly before turning the device off. Jongdae is already complaining for the screen lighting up the whole room.

 _Chanyeol I'm tired, let me_  
_sleep. I don't regret being_  
_your friend. I just want you_  
_to stop calling me when I_  
_try to sleep._

 

But Chanyeol doesn't stop, every three or four days now, at night he calls Baekhyun until he picks up. Their conversation is always short because Baekhyun works the day after and he can't bring himself to offer whatever emotional support Chanyeol needs, he can't forget he has a rent to pay and dreams to purchase, even if sometimes he wonders why this stupid giant hasn't come back to his apartment or what his kisses really meant. Baekhyun always finds himself in front of a dead end whenever he tries to dig deeper and figure out Chanyeol but running against a fugitive is tiring and Baekhyun isn't fit for a chase.  
So he always stops first.  
It's 3am and again, Chanyeol calls.

“I'm not playing cat and mouse with you Chanyeol.”

Is he even listening ? Is he even half sober to read between the lines ?

“You don't fit a mouse Baekhyunnie, you're a puppy. So let's fight like cat and dog.”

“I'm fighting with you right now.”

His annoying drunken laugh. “Really ? Why though ?”

Baekhyun sits up in bed, his patience running short with the lack of rest because he spends the night taking his calls. He wonders now, why is he still replying ? Why isn't he blocking Chanyeol's number for good ?  
And why is Chanyeol silent through the day but reaching out only at night when he's drunk ?

“Why do you only call me when you're high ?”

Chanyeol hangs up.

 

\--

 

“He's just leading you on.”

Baekhyun stirs the noodles after he emptied the seasoning and goes back to cutting spring onions, his phone left on speaker for Jongdae to be his counsellor of the night.

“But why ? There's nothing happening between us, hell since he kissed me I haven't seen his goddamn face !”

“Exactly ! He's unable to go further with you, he's probably in a relationship or something. Have you asked Jongin ?”

“I'm not doing that, Jongin found it already suspicious that I keep asking if Chanyeol is alright everytime we call or see each other.”

“You can't keep being his hotline support whenever he's shit-faced.”

“I know Dae, I know.”

“Do something drastic about it, even threaten him that you'll sue his ass for harassment and emotional distress !”

Baekhyun chuckles at that. “You really think he's gonna be scared ? Honestly ? His dad is a chaebol Jongdae !”

“Fuck them seriously ! They really think they have all the rights !”

Baekhyun turns off the stove, his ramyeon ready. “It's probably why Chanyeol can't take no for an answer, spoiled kid.”

“You sure you don't like him a little Byun Baekhyun ?”

He gasps. “Are you serious Kim Jongdae ??”

“Hey don't Kim Jongdae me, I'm freaking serious, I'm impressed you haven't blocked his number or complained to Jongin about it. You surprisingly deal with it for a while now and how many times were you worried about him the past few days, hu ?”

He only mumbles a slightly audible _ohmygodjongdaeplease_.

“Ah really ! Is it that kiss ? You had heart eyes when you detailed the kiss ! You can't possibly fall for someone you barely know because they kissed you, can you ?”

Now he wants to kill his best friend. “You know how selfless I am, I wear my heart on my sleeve. There isn't any love interest on my part.”

He sits at the kitchen counter, the pot fuming and he grabs the soft noodles with his chopsticks while Jongdae is mocking him, again. “You were falling in love every five minutes in college but there isn't any love interest on your side, my ass. You're basically a shoujo heroine Baekhyun ! I'm even surprised you friendzoned me !”  
Baekhyun almost chokes.

“I love you Dae but not like that.”

“AH ! Why do you all tell me that ? I'm pure boyfriend material !”

“You must be incredibly lonely if you're desperate about dicking me down.”

“Do I look like the kind of person that makes intentional mistakes ?”

“I'm going to crawl through your phone and fight you physically !”

He puts the spoon to his mouth, delighted by the spicy broath and Jongdae's chuckles resonate around him. “Calm down Sadako, I'm actually sure I'll win anyway.”

“I'm a black belt in hapkido stupid, I can probably pin John Cena.”

“Are you sure about that ?”

Now Baekhyun gets too carried away, fault of Jongdae who always brings out the worst in him. How did they even go from Chanyeol to John Cena ? This is ridiculous.

“You were supposed to help me figure out how I get rid of Park Chanyeol.”

“Just send an axe kick his way next time he comes around.”

“Hapkido doesn't teach you to attack someone who hasn't hit you first.”

“He hits on you, does that count ?”

He only laughs and grabs his phone to hang up. “Thanks for being useless and good night to you.”

“My pleasure always, I love you too Baekhyun.”

 

Speaking of the devil, he calls when Baekhyun is busy watching Train to Busan, probably more for Gong Yoo than for the plot but it took his mind off things until his phone rang in the middle of the movie. Baekhyun pauses it and takes the call, well aware that Chanyeol is never going to leave him alone if he tries to ignore him.  
He sits up, pushes his laptop away and sighs audibly to let the other know he's profoundly displeased.

“Hi Chanyeol, why'd you only call me when you're high ?”

He coughs, shifting noises reaching through the speaker. “I'm at home right now.”

Baekhyun frowns at the information. Chanyeol usually calls when he's out. “Are you high ?”

He lets out the cutest laugh, “It feels good Baekhyun. You should try one day.”

“I don't need it Chanyeol. I don't know why you do.”

Can he just say it ?

“I'm a coward.”

When Baekhyun laughs it unsettles him, even a little. “Chanyeol, you haven't been back here since-”  
He can't say it out loud. “This is no discovery for me.”  
But the next move was unpredictable.

“Would you go on a date with me ?”

Baekhyun's heart stops. Or it just pounds so fast that he can't even define each of his heartbeats. He's not saying anything, he's waiting for Chanyeol to laugh or crack a joke but he only hears his regular breathing and his own crazy heart wilding inside his chest. He feels trapped in a spider's web, unable to break free from the sticky strands. How does he untangle himself from this mess ?  
Without hurting Chanyeol's feelings ?

“I said would you go on a date with me Baekhyun ?”

It's even worse the second time. It's real and terrifying. “I heard you the first time Chanyeol.”

“Why aren't you saying anything then ?”

“Look, Chanyeol, I don't want to reject you but-”

“You're rejecting me now though.”  
  
Chanyeol chuckles nervously, because who is he kidding, it's what he was waiting for and that minuscule spark of hope had been swept away just like that. He's not good enough, he will never be good enough in Byun Baekhyun's eyes no matter how many times he tries to talk to him, to get closer, to captivate him, to be something for him even so much as a friend.  
He remembers Baekhyun's vivacious critics of chaebols, of the lifestyle he's known since he was born, of all the priviledges. He's been called an elitist, a daddy's boy. He's been laughed at for being someone who's never had to work for anything in his life because he was an heir and money could buy him everything. His life was planned out from the moment he was born until he'd be taking over his father's conglomerate.  
And for Byun Baekhyun, there wasn't anything to be proud of.  
_“You won the lottery, you and_ Chanyeol”, He said to Jongin and him once.” _Just for one day I'd like to know how it feels to widen the field of possibilities.”_  
Chanyeol had wanted back then to tell Baekhyun that he wasn't less of a man.  
And when once, Jongin proposed to set him up with one of his rich friends, Baekhyun had vehemently refused. _“Birds of a feather stick together. I'm not a charity case Jongin-ah. Besides I don't want to be involved romantically with any of your species. I don't want to fall in love and see him married off forcefully one day to a good girl from a good family whose father is a chaebol too.”_  
Baekhyun had laughed. _“Even you Jongin, how are you going to cope with breaking up with Taemin when your dad thinks it's time to protect his legacy with grandchildren ?”_  
_“I'll still see him, even if I have to marry a girl. I'll always be his.”_  
Baekhyun had shaken his head. _“Will Taemin accept to have the half of you ?...See, that's why I'd rather date someone who's not an heir, someone who grew up like me, someone who isn't going to be a puppet to his parents's social and financial status.”_  
Chanyeol had listened, all along, without uttering a single word. Baekhyun had rejected him even before he could have asked him out.  
And Baekhyun's doing it again, carelessly stomping on his feelings.

“Chanyeol...Listen-”

“It's alright Baekhyun, it's alright.”

Baekhyun bites his lips, defeated. His voice cracked, was he going to cry now ? Baekhyun remembers his heartbreaking sobs on his bathroom floor and he wants to forget because the guilt is eating him up from the inside out. “Chanyeol...I'm sorry. I'm not against you, you're a good person...I think...But I can't date someone who's high twenty-four seven.”

Chanyeol can't help but laugh at that, oh he laughs. “If I'm a coward Baekhyun, then you're a liar.”

“What ?”

Chanyeol's voice darkens. “A liar.” He repeats himself, detaching every syllable .”A fucking liar.”

There's no way Baekhyun is going to tolerate that, he's getting mad because it feels like Chanyeol is only provoking him out of revenge for the rejection. “Do you really think people enjoy going out with someone who's shit-faced all the time ? Seriously Park Chanyeol ?”

“It doesn't happen everyday and I'm sober for work all the time !”

“I don't care that you're sober for work ! What use is there if I'm dating someone who's only himself for his boss and coworkers ? Fucking seriously Chanyeol ?”

They're getting louder, the egos tickled, the things left unsaid all this time surfacing now.

“I'll stop then !”

He gets hysterical. “Of course ! Everything's easy, it's a piece of cake !”

“You think I can't cut out on it ? You think I'm a junkie ?!”

“Isn't it what you are Chanyeol ?! Why did you start in the first place ?!”

He isn't answering right away, he's chosing the words, the right words. What to tell, what to repress in the back of his mind so it doesn't come out too strong. Baekhyun cracks him.  
He rips apart the layers of a pretender he really isn't, that quiet Chanyeol who'd rather not talk and ruin everything. He wants to be appreciated so much by Baekhyun, so much that he wished countless times to die and reborn as someone else just so he'd have a chance.

He's _that_ pathetic.

“To forget Baekhyun. I take drugs and I drink to forget.”

He exhales all of his pent up frustration at the revelation. “To forget what ?!”

Chanyeol bites his lips. _Let it out. Tell him how you feel. He's growing tired of you. You'll lose him. Tell him. If not now, when will you ever ?_

“To forget that I'm not good enough. That I am who I am, that I'm trapped inside someone I don't want to be.”

Baekhyun can't help but snicker at that. Really ? A golden boy not good enough ? A man who's got the world at his feet as soon as his father retires ? A man who can almost buy you the moon ?

“Don't be so dramatic Chanyeol. You have everything. There are people out there who aren't that lucky.”

Chanyeol can feel them, the tears pooling. He can't bring himself to hate Baekhyun for being so judgemental because it's true, he's got everything. And he remembers that Alicia Keys song.  
It says that _everything means nothing if I ain't got you_. He stupidly grins through the tears because the lyrics they were written for him, for his idiotic self and his unrequited love.  
He's got everything but the one he yearns for. Money can't buy love, money can't buy Byun Baekhyun. His father won't ever accept his future CEO and son to be gay and to bring in his boyfriend home claiming like a rebel that he isn't going to marry the nice girl they picked for him.  
They say money can't buy happiness.  
Sure, that's why all this time Chanyeol mistaked reality with his dreams, feeding on the crumbles of Baekhyun he could have whenever he was with him, whenever he was calling him.  
He calls high because it's less painful to pretend.  
He calls high because at least Baekhyun seems to care.  
He calls high because sober Chanyeol can't be honest.

“No, I don't have everything...”

Baekhyun shakes his head, he's tired of the rich kid throwing a fit because he can't get that particular something that can't be bought. And he doesn't know what it is, that _something_ that Park Chanyeol desperately wants...

“It's you. I don't have you Baekhyun.”

_Me ?_

“So really, I don't have everything. I'd rather have nothing but you. I don't care about money. You're all I want Baekhyun.”  
  
“I- ...”, Chanyeol hangs up on him.

 

 

It's been two days since they last talked.  
Chanyeol always sends his calls to his voicemail.

 

\--

 

“Are we still having dinner together Jongin-ah ?”

Baekhyun is on his way home, he finished work early and wanted to check with Jongin if they were still meeting up in the evening. He steals a glance one more time at the screen to see if the bluetooth is working fine when finally he hears the younger who sounds agitated. “Ah Baekhyun hyung ! There is a problem.”

Baekhyun pouts. He had been waiting for this night to eventually see Chanyeol with the hope he'd stick around Jongin to try to talk to him but life was visibly against his plans.

“I have to cover Chanyeol hyung's files. He's been on a sick leave since monday and I have twice the usual amount of work.”

Baekhyun frowns. “He's sick ?”

“I don't know what's wrong with him, he stays home and acts like he's been dumped. I even proposed to him to party to take his mind off things but he refused.”

“It's so not Chanyeol...”

“Right ? He's been weird for a while and I can't even check up on him today because I bet that by 9pm I'll still be stuck in the office.”

Baekhyun stops at a red light. “Do you want me to go there ? I can bring him some porridge and see if he talks to me.”

It was a white lie but Baekhyun couldn't just tell Jongin that his two favorite hyungs had kissed and were entangled in a mess that caused them both a lot of emotional distress.  
He couldn't, no.

“You'd do that hyung ?”

“Yes why not.” Because really there was no other solution to corner Park Chanyeol than to step into his own territory from where he wouldn't be able to escape.

“Wah thank you Baekhyun hyung, you're the best ! I'm really worried about him, I hope you can help him, I can't survive another week at work like this.”

Baekhyun laughs. Sure Jongin was worried about his friend.  
  
He drives to that place not too far from his apartment where a cute plump ahjumma makes the best homemade dishes. From bachelors who can't cook to busy mothers, she never fails to satisfy the culinary needs of the neighborhood. Baekhyun is a regular, he can barely cook and since he's started to work at a clothing line company, it's usually late when he comes home and tiredness often gets in the way of his adult life resolutions. He had promised himself that he'd learn to cook proper meals, he even bought cooking books for that but they're still in the kitchen cabinet and he hasn't even removed the plastic wrap around them. Instead of ordering in unhealthy food or consume yet another pack of ramyeon, he'd rather eat homemade dishes and so he comes here and goes with the ahjumma's suggestions of the day. It's like having another mother in Seoul while his real one is in Bucheon.  
She knows about his preferences by now, today though she seems surprised by his choice.

“Porridge ? I have abalone porridge today. Are you sick Baekhyun-shi ?”

He shakes his head. “It's for a friend.” Even that felt weird. He's never been really sure about calling Chanyeol a friend. Even when he's the one who suggested it. But now he just did, naturally.

“Oh, it's so nice from you to take care of him.”

Baekhyun only chuckles awkwardly and smiles at the woman who takes care of his order while a part-timer takes Baekhyun's card. When it's ready, he grabs the bags from the ahjumma and drives off to Chanyeol's place.

 

Of course, Park Chanyeol lives in Gangnam and Baekhyun feels like a stain on a white cloth in a five star restaurant. He's never really liked the pricy atmosphere of this district.  
Chanyeol lives on the 14th floor of a modern building with marbles all over the entry hall. There's only another neighboor opposite Chanyeol's door and it definitely means that he lives in a freaking palace.  
He rings the doorbell of the number 6 and waits. He can't say he isn't nervous, he almost wants to retreats and go back home but he's not the type to leave things hanging and he's been frustrated over Chanyeol's antics for over a month now. He needs closure, he needs to know what's wrong with him.  
When Chanyeol opens, he's nonchalant and dull but at the sight of Baekhyun's grinning face, he becomes absolutely baffled.

“What are you doing here ?!”

He passes by him and looks around his huge apartment complex, admiring the expensive furnitures he could only dream of. Everything was neat and tidy, there wasn't a spark of dust anywhere and Baekhyun imagines that Chanyeol has a maid because there is no way he can take care of a house when he is barely able to take care of himself.  
He turns around finally and observes Chanyeol's incredulous face who wonders why his crush is in the middle of his living-room, visibly enjoying himself. He's smiling and it tickles Chanyeol's heart.

“Why are you here ?”

Baekhyun leaves the bags packed with food on the open kitchen counter.

“I came to see you stupid. Jongin told me you were sick.”

“I don't want anyone here.”

Baekhyun sits on his leather armchair, a tiny space near a large window with a superb view on Seoul. “So you have the right to barge into my place but I can't ??”

Chanyeol can't speak, someone cut his tongue, plays with it and it's Byun Baekhyun.

“You disappeared. No calls, no knocks at my door in the middle of the night...You vanished just like that and without even having a proper conversation with me.”

He stands there, silently, his eyes for his persian carpet. Everything's bottling up around his throat but his lips are sealed.  
  
“I came here Chanyeol so we can fix whatever needs to be fixed.”

But really Chanyeol was just so tensed that he ended up chuckling to himself. Fix what ? Really ?

“There's nothing to fix because we're nothing Baekhyun.”

He raises one finger. “You don't get to speak on my behalf. I'm here so we can talk.”

With long strides, his slender legs brings him in the armchair facing Baekhyun. He crosses his legs, fixes his ebony satin bathrobe, pushes away the strands of dark hair obstructing his vision and crosses his arms like a grounded kid. Baekhyun finds him adorable, really, but it was better to keep it to himself.

“Then let's talk Baekhyun, I'm sober, I'm miserable, I'm all yours.”

He rolls his eyes. “Yes thank you drama queen.”  
And then, Baekhyun looks at the scenery, awfully quiet, suspending the moment and adding more tension in the already thick air. He licks his lips at least thrice, uncrosses his legs only to cross them again and clears his throat like he's about to give an important speech at a wedding ceremony.  
His eyes shifts from the window to Chanyeol.  
Chanyeol's holding his breath.

“I'll go on a date with you.”  
He spoke in a soft voice, a bit shyly, so different from the confident Baekhyun who entered his apartment complex earlier. Chanyeol's stunned. “Wh-What ?”

Baekhyun scoops a little forward on his armchair, a little closer to Chanyeol, his expression conveying only honesty.

“I'll go on a date with you...I mean I don't really know you Chanyeol. It's unfair to reject you if I don't know you at all. “

He shakes his head, of course it could only be **that**.

“You know what Baekhyun, I don't need your **pity**.”

Baekhyun flicks his forehead and Chanyeol yelps in pain. “It's not pity idiot. Ever since I've met you, I've wanted to get to know you but you were always avoiding me...”

He rubs the spot where he's been hit, what Baekhyun said surprises him.  
So he noticed...

“I'm sorry...I've never wanted to come off as rude. It's just...It's just-”

He doesn't see it coming but Baekhyun puts two fingers around his lips, closes them with a slight frown on his forehead then he grins.

“It's alright Chanyeol. Let's go on a date and catch up.”

 


	2. Chapter 2

For their date, they agree on a movie night.

  
Chanyeol proposes Bohemian Rhapsody, he really wants to watch it and with his hectic schedule he hasn't been able to go. He still makes sure Baekhyun is up for it and when he sees him nod and smile he's satisfied.  
It's still surreal to him. Especially when he sees Baekhyun approaching him inside the movie theatre, his round glasses perched on the end of his nose, in a long black coat. He's hiding his hands in his pockets and he walks up to Chanyeol with a grin.  
It seems like his hair is a little blonder than usual, or maybe it's just the contrast with his dark coat.

He's slightly out of breath as he stops before Chanyeol with a smile. “Hey” 

The taller can't help but smile back, smitten. “Hi.” 

“How are you today ?”

The sudden attention troubles Chanyeol. “I'm...fine.”

Baekhyun beams. “Good. Let's go ?”

He hates himself because he didn't even return the question and it keeps haunting him as they reach the ticket machine. He's so out of it that he doesn't hear Baekhyun ask him where they should sit.

“Chanyeol ?”

“I'm sorry Baekhyun, where do you like it best ?”

He observes the way he bites his lips and can't help but to remember how they felt against his.

_Chanyeol get a grip, you both need to get to know each other, you're not supposed to be thinking about kissing him again !_

“Let's sit in the middle.”

Chanyeol takes out his card to pay but Baekhyun beats him to it. “Baekhyun !”

He giggles and ignores the giant who complains behind him, types his code and retrieves the tickets.

“I'm the one who asked you out on a date !”

Baekhyun pouts. “You'll pay for food, stop whining already.”

Chanyeol sulks a little but still orders popcorns and drinks, the biggest size and makes sure that everything is to Baekhyun's liking. He wants to order more food but Baekhyun wants to eat dinner after the movie and he's relieved to know that he can still pamper his date more later. They find their seats while the commercials are on and they both start to munch on their popcorns silently. Chanyeol picked his favorite, caramel flavored while Baekhyun settled for the regular.

“You want some ?”

Baekhyun shakes his head no and the silence comes back. Chanyeol drinks through his straw, doing as much noise as he can. It's so awkward and he wishes he could easily break the ice but what's to break ? Baekhyun saw him vulnerable and in ways that not even Jongin, his childhood best friend, had seen him.  
  
He wants Baekhyun's attention, he wants it, craves it. Even now that he's just sitting beside him. Baekhyun seems immersed in the commercials, he's not looking at Chanyeol.  
He wonders, why do I want him to see only me ?  
It's not for the thrill, not to feed his ego, not even to brag about his monthly income like some of his rich friends do to their dates.  
Chanyeol isn't like that, he doesn't care about money. Sure, it helps to live a carefree life but ever since he's been a child, it hasn't been one of his interest.  
He isn't fond of childhood memories like everyone else. He can't remember a single lovely family time. The hugs, the kisses, the I love yous, all of it is foreign to Chanyeol.  
His tiny hand could only fit in the maid's one. His attempts at growing closer to his parents felt like closed doors to his nose.  
He isn't even sure if his parents love him at all. Do they care about him ? Chanyeol thinks he's only loved for being an heir. He's an asset to take over the chairman's position one day and so, that's why he's precious.  
He's not the first born, but his noona is too busy being a news anchor and his father doesn't want to let her future husband to take over his wealth.  
So naturally, it's their beloved Chanyeol who's the chosen one. Did they ask him if he wanted to do that ?  
Never.  
The Parks never asked what their children dreamt to do though Yoora had a way out, being her father's favorite. She wasn't the heir of his conglomerates, she could go do her things before getting married and becoming a full time spouse.

It was a common agreement.

But Chanyeol didn't have a choice. His whole future was planned out by his father and the board members and as time was passing by, Chanyeol was well aware that one day he'd have to step up and give up on his liberty.  
Just like being sentenced to death.  
It wasn't even a prison to him, it was death itself.  
Being robbed of your life for the sake of others.

Until he met Baekhyun, Chanyeol thought of himself as a walking dead living to fulfill his parents's greed.

Every silly dream he had when he was younger were slowly erasing themselves from his mind, like he's been brainwashed by a tyrant's propaganda.  
And his parents are his persecutors.

He remembers 5 year old Chanyeol who wanted to become an astronaut but he'd been told “ _honey you can't, you'll become a chairman like your father._ ”

When music became his solace during highschool, he's never forgotten that day he refused to tag along to the board meeting because he had drum class.  
He can't forget the anger in his father's eyes and the violence he used to destroy and crush his drum set.  
Chanyeol cried so much that day. Usually a teenager knows his first heartbreak in highschool but it wasn't a girl who broke his heart.  
He was a sixteen years old sobbing over his musical instruments ruined by a controlling father. From the drum set, to his acoustic guitar, to his beloved Gibson Les Paul.  
Everything crushed.  
The beautiful melodies Chanyeol obtained from his instruments turned to the heartbreaking cacophony his father created.  
Broken wood, cords hanging from the destroyed bodies of his guitars here and there, Chanyeol realized his heart was in the same state.  
Shattered.  
It wasn't coming from love. It was coming from hate.  
That's when Chanyeol had started to loathe his father.

It was enough to him, to see his most beloved possessions blown to bits, dismantled, extinguished.

But then his father turned to his collection of CDs and vinyl records, throwing them on the floor, trampling on them like a ferocious beast, grunting in the process of breaking every single CD case, splitting his vinyl records on his knee mercilessly.  
And Chanyeol broke repeatedly with all of them.

His father's face was red, contorsed with anger and disgust for a son who wanted to grow wings and fly away from the fate he had choosen for him.

They didn't speak to each other for years after that. But everytime his mother came to him to talk in her husband's behalf, Chanyeol had listened. He went to the board meetings, he picked the major his father wanted for him, he flew to New York to train there.

Chanyeol wasn't himself anymore.

Living alone brought him peace, living in New York made him forget momentarily that he still had to go back to Seoul to one day give up on himself.  
He went to a bar near his apartment one night, in Upper East Side. He was with Jongin on the phone and it was the first time he had heard of Baekhyun.  
He didn't even know him but from the stories Jongin was telling, Chanyeol knew that he was a good person.

“ _I wish I could introduce you to Baekhyun hyung ! He's a great guy but he keeps telling me to live for myself everytime we meet._ ”

Chanyeol laughed at that.

“ _We even argued yesterday._ ”

He's interested. “ _You argued ?_ ”

“ _Baekhyun hyung kept telling me that I should quit, that it's my life and no one should dictate me how to live it_.”

“ _How silly...”_

“ _Right ?_ ”

Chanyeol realized how bitter he's become. He didn't even allow himself to dream anymore, that was how broken he was inside. Jongin was younger and often Chanyeol saw him as a little brother and hearing themselves being bitter about dreams ?  
It was terrible.

Chanyeol's eyes fell on the adjacent wall of the bar and his breath hitched.  
The red neon quote on it shining in the dim lit room said ' _this is the sign you are looking for_ '.

He wondered then, what kind of sign is Byun Baekhyun ?

Is he a prophet urging him to chase his dreams, to give up, to get away from his abusive family ?

Is Byun Baekhyun his propeller ?

He didn't even know him but he kept thinking about it, his words had planted seeds in his mind.

And when they met, Chanyeol's heart stopped because he hadn't planned that Byun Baekhyun, fashion major, working as a junior designer for a korean clothing line would be handsome.  
Chanyeol never believed in love at first sight until he met Baekhyun.

He hadn't noticed him until Jongin brought attention to him. Chanyeol was ashamed even for not seeing him right away.

He's beautiful.

And unreachable.

Chanyeol in his weird attempt at staying away from someone he had a crushed on kept suffering for months. He didn't want to be someone who could disappoint him. It was his top priority to be a man Baekhyun could praise and appreciate.

He was seeking for his love.

But then, one day, Baekhyun had heavily put down his social status, his family, his fate.

“ _You are who you are because you inherited it from your father, your grandfather and so on_.”

I never asked for it, wanted to say Chanyeol.

But he kept mum and took the blow.

 _You're ridiculous, how can he even fall for you when he hates your status of heir_ ?

Baekhyun became his obsession.

And Chanyeol, as much as he needed him started to fear him too. He didn't want to grow close to him too much. Baekhyun was too dangerous, he kept watering the seeds in his mind, he gave him hope.  
Hope for a future free from his father, the conglomerates, a forced marriage, a depression.

He kept waking up every night after dreaming of a life with Baekhyun, full of love, of travels and happiness.

So he stayed away from Baekhyun, more and more and the recreational use of drugs turned into regular needs to forget his miserable fate.  
Jongin didn't seem to notice how they were both falling into that routine, little by little until one day when they were on the way to the club...Jongin said that it was scary how only drugs helped him not to lose it.

What a paradox.

Chanyeol agreed. Without drugs, he'd have slit his own wrists, he'd have taken the whole box of sleeping pills, he'd have jumped off his window.

But they were cowards.

They were burning the candle at both ends, nothing to lose, nothing to win.

How can you both love and hate your life at the same time ?

Chanyeol considered ending his life countless times, from that day his father smashed his guitars to his 25th birthday. The urge was unbearable sometimes but it calmed down in New York.  
The prospect of coming back to Seoul awakened the morbid thoughts but the smile of Byun Baekhyun alone blown them away.  
  
Chanyeol needs the light to sweep the darkness away. Baekhyun's his radiance.

And it's exactly why he's profoundly scared of his impact in his dull damned life. He doesn't want to depend on Baekhyun to find happiness, he doesn't want him to have such an important responsibility.

He stayed away, he shouldn't fall for someone who could nurture his dreams of being a fugitive from the future his father chose for him.  
He stayed away then.

Chanyeol didn't know that he had it in himself, the same greed as his parents. The greed to want some things that much. But contrary to his parents, he didn't want money, a reputation.

At first he was confused, _why do I want to be loved by Baekhyun so much ?_

_Is it love ? Is it just lust disguised as love ?_

_Am I transmiting on him my desire to be loved by my parents ?_

_Do I really love you Byun Baekhyun ?_

He barely knows Baekhyun. He knows him after Jongin, after the moments spent together around a meal or a beer after work, he knows him through his social media that he watches everyday to understand why he couldn't let go...

He stayed away, he tried.

But Chanyeol wants more, he wants all of Baekhyun.

“So you went back to work ?”

Chanyeol, once again, almost didn't hear him.

“I did. Even if Jongin worked on my files, I still had to re-organize everything because I hate the way he handles things.”

Baekhyun laughs, mouth full of popcorn. “He seems clumsy.”

Finally the lights are out and the movie begins. The life of Freddie Mercury unfolds before their eyes, from his debut in a London club with a band missing a singer where he's catcalled _Paki_ to their artistic journey becoming Queen and touring the world, Chanyeol is so immersed in the movie that he almost forgets Baekhyun.  
From the corner of his eye, Baekhyun glances once in a while and sees a myriad of emotions on Chanyeol's face.

He's touched by buck-toothed Farrokh most known under the nickname Freddie, he's touched by his battles, his hopes, his choices.  
He's not what his parents wanted him to be. He wants to be a rock star, he wants to be free.

The tension of being gay in the 70's and moreover when you had conservative parents, that closeted Freddie speaks to Chanyeol in a language he knows by heart.

He empathizes, oh God he does.  
He's sitting there feeling a connection with a singer long dead, a year before he was born.  
He knows about being an outcast and having to refrain your real self that sleeps soundly inside not to disturb others around. He sympathizes with the longing for a father's love he's never seen. He tries to walk on the path his father showed him.

He tries, Chanyeol tries to love girls as much as he loves men but it's a melody lacking harmony, it hits a wrong note.

He knows the loneliness, the nights spent looking for some warmth to make him forget how unfair his future is going to be.

Farrokh wasn't loved for who he really was, Freddie was loved for being a rock star but who really knew him ? And who really knew Park Chanyeol ?  
He can't help but make parallels, he sees himself in the tortured mind of the singer.

He feels the tears coming when Freddie writes Love of My Life. He blinks, repeatedly, he can't cry when Baekhyun is right there, when his _Love_ is right here.

They don't talk, both stealing looks at each other when the other isn't paying attention.

They're comfortable, Baekhyun enjoys the movie and even finds inspiration for future designs while Chanyeol feels every skin cell vibrating to the music, _his_ beloved music.

It's during that part of the movie when Freddie Mercury stands on the Live Aid stage after he's been diagnosed with AIDS that Chanyeol shows first signs of sadness.  
Baekhyun notices then that he's frowning, sees his Adam's apple going up and down and his jaws tightening.

Chanyeol is tring to swallow the sorrow away.

Freddie is playing the piano, it's _Bohemian Rhapsody_.

And there's a part where Chanyeol can't hold it in anymore. The tears are falling, tracing wet patterns on his cheeks until they die lower on his neck or when they take the jump on Chanyeol's sweater.

 

♪ _Too late, my time has come  
__Sent shivers down my spine  
__Body's aching all the time  
__Goodbye everybody  
__I've got to go  
__Gotta leave you all behind  
__and face the truth  
__Mama, oh, ooooh,  
__I don't wanna die,  
__I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all ♪_

 

And he moves his fingers, and Baekhyun sees, he moves his fingers like he's got his good old friend, his Gibson Les Paul trapped in his embrace and he plays that guitar solo that he knows by heart.  
He plays it for himself, he plays it for Freddie, he plays it for Queen and he plays it for Baekhyun too.

He's crying, almost the whole live and he can't even look into Baekhyun's eyes when this one reaches out for his face to wipe away his tears. He lets him, he cries and again Baekhyun is the one comforting him. He feels his warm fingers erasing the sadness on his cheeks.  
He finally turns to him and Baekhyun's smiling with an expression he can't quite decipher.

But Baekhyun is looking at him with warmth, he's pouring out tenderness for Chanyeol to see how touching he is, crying in a movie theatre for someone he never met, for his compassion and good heart.

Baekhyun realizes how beautiful Chanyeol's heart is.

Right _now_.

When the movie's over, they stay for the credits as videos of Freddie singing appear. They both sit silently and enjoys together the last moments they are spending with the legendary Freddie Mercury was, a true artist, a gay icon and maybe a little their friend of the night.

When it's over and everyone stands up, Chanyeol doesn't move and Baekhyun stays still. Some people look because the dark haired sitting there looked like he was crying.

Chanyeol doesn't care, really.

He's not less of a man.

Maybe Baekhyun's judging him too. _Men cry too._

They're left alone, finally. Baekhyun reaches out for Chanyeol's hand and squeezes it.

Again, there's not a single word exchanged, only warmth, only body language. Chanyeol squeezes back and they finally stand up to leave. Their hands part as they grab the drinks and popcorn buckets.

They throw everything out and exit the movie theatre, sticking close. The streets of Seoul are cold, night has fallen and the sky is starless.

Baekhyun wants to speak but Chanyeol seems withdrawn in his own little bubble that he isn't willing to burst. He'd rather have Chanyeol come back on his own than disturb his train of thoughts.

In fact, Baekhyun's pensive too.

“You're hungry ?”

He's surprised to hear Chanyeol's hoarse voice after spending so much time being silent.

“Are you Chanyeol ?” 

He gives a small smile. Ah finally, thinks Baekhyun.

“A little. I didn't even eat my popcorns.”

Baekhyun can't help but laugh. “I noticed.”

Chanyeol brings him to a hanwoo barbecue place in Gangnam where they have the best meat quality, from korean beef to wagyu, they even have black angus.

Baekhyun is already salivating, his date is spoiling him.

They are served a large number of side dishes, lettuce, garlic and different type of sauces. Chanyeol takes care of the meat and Baekhyun can't help but study him, his features, his gestures.

“Why are you looking at me like that ?”

He's cornered.

“You're doing a good job, is all.”

Chanyeol raises an eyebrow. “The heat is too low, I'm only placing the meat right now.”

“Still, it's a good job.” Baekhyun adverts his eyes and grabs some kimchi with his chopsticks. He isn't saying more because he keeps thinking about Chanyeol's teary eyes and how much that movie resonated with him.

But he's interrupted.

“I still feel weird.”

Baekhyun stares, he's listening.

“I'm in a weird mood. I feel sad for Freddie, I feel sorry for myself. He had the guts to pursue his dreams, to turn his back to his parents's expectations. He became who he wanted to be.”

He places the last portion of meat on the grill and sits back. “He lived his life to the fullest, to the point of no return. He still sang on stage and everywhere with the same passion, the same killer mindset. And that I admire. He really is a champion.”

Baekhyun can't help but smile.

“But Baekhyun I-...I'm far from that. I'm not where I want to be. I'm not living, I'm surviving. The money's not mine, this life isn't mine. My parents will live vicariously through me one day and just like that I'll be stolen of myself. 

He stops, overwhelmed and Baekhun takes his chance. “You're an accomplice only if you comply Chanyeol. You have a choice, it's your life.”

He can't help but chuckle. It's irritating because he feels like Baekhyun can't understand what he's been going through until now. They all think he's having a perfect life because he's from a rich family.

“We can't choose our family and our parents Chanyeol. But your life, it belongs to you. You have all the rights to choose how to live it.”

Baekhyun bites his lips, he's concerned by Chanyeol's sudden silence but he knows now that it means the other is deep in thoughts. He doesn't want to alienate him by being indelicate.

“I know it's easy to talk, I've known from Jongin how hard it is to break free from your circle, that life isn't black or white but you still have to make a choice. Either you go with your parent's wish or you fight for yourself. It's all I can say, I can't make that choice for you and no one should. It's your life Chanyeol.”

“You must think it's pathetic...”

Baekhyun doesn't like the carefulness in his tone.

“Not one bit. It's not your fault Chanyeol. You only wanted to be a good son but you didn't know it would scar you so much.”

Here.

Chanyeol's speechless because he says all the things he needed to hear for so long.

“Chanyeol have you tried seeing a therapist ?”

Baekhyun is walking on egg shells. Chanyeol doesn't seem to be offended.

“Never.”

Baekhyun extends his hand above the grill to see if it's hotter now, he's a little hungry. “I think it'd help you a lot. You've been used to comply to your parents's needs and suppress your own desires so much that I think it will be hard for you to change. It became a habit to forget yourself.”

“You think it became automatic for me ?”

Baekhyun nods, munching on marinated vegetables.  
It makes sense after all, Chanyeol can't remember the last time he went against his parents and how he always tries to make no waves. Maybe deep down he's scared of the possible consequences if he had to oppose and voice out his own needs.

“I think you're right.”

Baekhyun's eyes soften at that, he's touched by Chanyeol's inner child who's trapped inside a grown up's body because no one let him fall and stand up on his own, no one let him experience the things he wanted to discover by himself. Like a robot, Chanyeol obeyed and went with the flow, mostly out of fear but also out of love for parents who disregarded him.

And it's sad for Baekhyun to have Chanyeol's eyes full of tears he doesn't want to shed.

“Chanyeol-ah...”

He looks up. “You can talk to me when it's too much.”

He quickly focuses on flipping the meat with the tongs and grabs the scissors to cut it into regular pieces. Again, he feels naked under Baekhyun's eyes.

“I don't want to burden you Baekhyun.”

Baekhun rests his head on his hand, elbow on the table. “You won't.”

“I don't want you to see me like that.”

The waiter brings two warm bowls of rice, interrupting them a little to ask if they need anything. When he leaves, Baekhyun can't help but pick up the conversation back where they left it.

“As friends, it should be alright for you to show yourself to me even in times of hardships.”

Chanyeol laughs. “Maybe, but I want more than your friendship.”

This time he purposely avoids his gaze, Chanyeol starts making a wrap with the first pieces of meat that are cooked to their taste, medium rare, he adds garlic, dips the meat in the sauce and when it's ready, he bends over the table a little for Baekhyun to open his mouth.  
Baekhyun's a bit surprised but he complies anyway and receives Chanyeol's wrap with a shy smile.

“I want you to see me as a man. As someone you can rely on too. That's why Baekhyunnie, I can't always lean on you everytime I feel down.”

What a blushing mess he is, suddenly. Is it the wrap, the warmth radiating from Chanyeol's eyes or his honest confession ? He chews and smiles adorably at him and he knows exactly what to say once he swallows his food.

“It's not about being a man or not. I don't want someone who's not true to himself.”

Chanyeol chokes a little on his rice and Baekhyun pours him a glass of water with a smirk. He places it in front of Chanyeol and starts making a wrap too.

“A relationship is about trust and it means that you should be able to rely on your partner during good times but during hard times even more.”

Like Chanyeol, when he's done with the wrap, he extends his arm and gently offers it to his date. He's satisfied to see him chew and takes advantage of that to talk some more. Chanyeol tries not to show it too much but the gesture makes his heart swell with feelings for him.

“To be honest, I like sensitive men who cry freely and express their emotions without caring about what people think. It's a true masculine energy to me. So please, Chanyeol, don't change that about you.”

Baekhyun reaches out for a piece of meat with his chopsticks. “I've had enough of shy elusive Chanyeol, it's refreshing to see a side of you that I don't know. I like it.”

It's too much for Chanyeol, he swallows and can't hide the stupid grin on his face. Baekhyun is enjoying himself too much and it kills him. It's even better than what he had imagined.

“So you were really serious about this date...”

Baekhyun pouts. “Of course I was. I'm a little offended you doubted me.”

Chanyeol shakes his head, “I only had doubts about myself.”

“Well you shouldn't. I hope I can learn more about you and see for myself that you're a good person.”

Chanyeol feels like a teenager around his crush, Baekhyun's too bold and his heart keeps being too loud. He decides to focus on grilling the meat because at least it gives him an excuse to avoid Baekhyun's pretty gaze.

Baekhyun though feels torn. He's been waiting for this day probably as much as Chanyeol and there's not one wrong note. Chanyeol's a gentleman who knows how to take care of his date, he's hopelessly human and isn't scared to show his feelings but Baekhyun can't forget that at the end of the day, he's an heir.

He's chained by blood to be a chaebol, one day, unless he decides to break free. But Baekhyun feels tormented inside as he knows that if he ever lets himself fall for Chanyeol, his battles will become theirs.

It's not the issue that terrifies him, it's the role he might have. Baekhyun doesn't want Chanyeol to throw away his status of heir out of love for example.

What if they break up once Chanyeol is stripped of family ties ?

Who's going to be here for him if their story ends ?

Chanyeol will be alone.

He wonders why he's drawn to the negative side of the story, really, but he's seen it in tv shows how chaebols could be scary and heartless. Is it even what could happen in real life ?

He isn't sure that he wants to see Chanyeol's father find him one day to humiliate him or pull strings so he'd lose his job as a revenge for stealing away his son.

How is Chanyeol going to live ? He's working for his father in the end, P&K Corporation is still a branch of Park Group, even if the CEO is Jongin's father. How is he going to find a new job ?

Baekhyun's mind is assaulted with what ifs, it's a mess and Chanyeol notices.

“Why are you spacing out like that ?”

“You need to think thoroughly about what you're going to do Chanyeol.”

“Suddenly ?” He laughs nervously.

“Think about the consequences, about solutions to every little issue, have back up plans and don't let yourself be surprised by the slightest obstacle.”

It's making him anxious, really, the solemn tone of Baekhyun's voice.

“I know Baekhyun. Why do you think I've been torturing myself all this time ?”

Chanyeol's been thinking a lot, about where to live, how to find a job without having his father finding him. He's been saving up all of his salary from working for Google LLC in New York and stored it up in a bank account under another name.

He's been preparing himself silently, in case it becomes an emergency to save himself from this unwanted life.

It strikes him now that being on a date his only a selfish whim. How can he ask from Baekhyun to get closer if one day he has to leave ? What if he gives Baekhyun worries and problems because of his choice ?

“Maybe it wasn't a good idea...This date.”

Baekhyun sighs at that. “You've been punishing yourself for a while. It's time to stop.”

_Does he mean the drugs ?_

“Preventing yourself from having a love life is perpetuating your parents's control over you.”

Chanyeol drops a few pieces of grilled meat on Baekhyun's rice. “But I can't let you carry that burden with me.”

“It's only our first date and it's my choice to make Chanyeol.”

He smiles, a little relieved not to be tasting rejection. He observes Baekhyun make another wrap and looks surprised that it's for him again. He takes it happily and asks, mouth full. “Did you just agree on another date ? 

He shrugs, “Maybe.”

The rest of their dinner, they spend it talking about the movie and their favorite Queen songs. Chanyeol is offering his full attention to Baekhyun who forgot how is it to have someone else taking care of him. Chanyeol looks a lot more relaxed than when they exited the movie theatre and Baekhyun particularly likes hearing his laugh.

In the back of his mind he can't erase the feeling that he's playing with fire, asking Chanyeol on a date after rejecting him and especially now that from what he's seen, Chanyeol is lovable and selfless to a point it concerns him. Oh and that obviously, Chanyeol might be infatuated with him already.

They walk around after they leave the barbecue restaurant, Chanyeol's car is two blocks away and Baekhyun doesn't mind. There's poetry in walking together under the night sky with a silence that says more than their loud minds. They smile at each other, both a little regretful that their time together is coming to an end. They don't tell each other though.

Chanyeol feels satisfied and his mind is at peace because Baekhyun doesn't look like he will run away from him, even after talking about his family.

To be able to speak his mind without the drugs, without the liquor, it was unexpected and he was a little proud of himself for that.

“Did you like it ?”

Baekhyun beams. “I liked the date Chanyeol and especially because you talked to me for once.”

He hides his hands in his pockets, a bit embarrassed. “Ah if I had known...Wouldn't have wasted so much time running away from you.”

Chanyeol sees him pout adorably and he feels the urge to kiss him but it's too soon.

“Right ? Besides I don't know why anyone would run away from me, I'm lovely.”

He stops and stares at Baekhyun and yes, he realizes he's head over heels for him. It's surprising to find himself falling even more for him with just a few hours spent together and they haven't even talked that much about themselves and their personal stories yet.

“It's exactly because you're lovely that I did.”

He adjusts his glasses a little on his button nose. “Stop thinking you're not worth it Park Chanyeol.”

He smiles. “You think I am ?”

“I'm on a date with you, I think it's enough of a proof.”

Baekhyun turns around and walks, leaves a mum Chanyeol on the pavement. He loves teasing him, it's easy and he wins. He hears footsteps behind him and he can almost feel the warmth radiating from Chanyeol's body. He's walking close, his arm brushing against Baekhyun's.

Chanyeol drives Baekhyun home although this one argued that he could take a taxi back and that he should head home since they were in Gangnam but he didn't leave him a choice.

When the car stops, they keep smiling at each other. “Thank you for tonight. I enjoyed it.”

Chanyeol looks pleased. “I did too. 

“Text me when you're home ? Be careful.”

He waits for him to disappear behind the elevator's doors to drive away.

 

 

“I can't believe you went on a date with Park Chanyeol !”

He laughs, he was already dreading this conversation.

“He's a decent man, really.”

Jongdae sighs. “Decent ? He literally harassed you !”

Baekhyun applies his face mask on his cleaned skin and rolls his eyes. “He's actually a sweetheart once you get past the weirdo.”

His friend snorts. “They all are sweet until they cut you into pieces and throw you in the Han River !”

“Chanyeol's a big baby, he only needs affection and a little attention.”

Baekhyun settles down on his bed, showered and relaxed after his date and it's not even Jongdae who can spoil the mood. “A little attention ? Even a leech is less clingy than he is.”

“You're being a meanie.”

“I'm just wearing my super best friend cape and trying to protect you from a possible mistake.”

“I appreciate but I know what I'm doing.”

He hears Jongdae sigh. “I thought you didn't want to date any of them rich kids.”

It's in the back of his mind, he can't forget it. Ever since he came home, Baekhyun can't help but think about the whole package that comes with Chanyeol. He's sure that he isn't ready for all of it but he still wants to be Chanyeol's friend.  
At least.

“I don't. 

“Then what the hell are you doing Baekhyun ?”

“I want to be his friend.”

Jongdae mocks him right away. “So now friends go on dates together ?”

Baekhyun grunts. “Oh come on, I only want to get to know him for now, no feelings, nothing. I want us to enjoy dates together and then we'll see where we go from there. Maybe we'll just stay friends Dae.”

“Baek you know that everything in life comes with strings attached right ? What do you do when he falls in love with you ? Or worse, when YOU fall for him ?”

He stays silent for a while and Jongdae goes on. “You sign up for troubles Baekhyun. Even if you guys manage to be together for a while, you know that one day his father is going to interfere and it's not a korean drama, it's real life. You probably both won't have your happily ever after. Are you sure you're up for a heartbreak ?”

Did he say that Jongdae couldn't spoil the mood ?  
Well he really underestimated him.

“Why do I feel like a shakespearean character right now ?”

“My life's already tragic, don't make it harder by killing yourself out of love.”

“Plants really do make better friends than people.”

He gets it, he's been Baekhyun's best friend for a decade.

“Plants don't talk and can't tell you when you're about to be stupid.”

“Exactly Dae, my point.”

“Well if you want to be delusional go ahead but when you fall and it hurts don't ring my phone to cry your heart out. Bye, my jjajangmyeon is here !”

He hangs up and Baekhyun feels down now that Jongdae shed light on his fears. He was genuinely scared to get attached to Chanyeol and he didn't want to love him too much someday, even as a friend. He's always been protective and even fought with one of Jongdae's ex because he cheated on him once. So he knew, that even only as a friend, he'd feel obligated to help Chanyeol out of his father's grip.

It's his flaw, Baekhyun thinks he can help the whole world and especially the ones he love. It's a blessing but most times, you also attract all kind of curses that come under the form of very sexy and gorgeous men who will break your heart and have no qualms.

He's had his fair share of cheaters or weirdos and for sure he knows Park Chanyeol isn't one of their species.  
It's endearing how he desperately tried for a month to have Baekhyun's attention, even if most times he really could have killed him for stealing away his beauty sleep but Baekhyun knew that it was his only way to express himself.

Chanyeol's been emotionnally neglected all his life by parents who only loved him for being a male heir. So really should he be surprised that his only outlet had been drugs ? Alcohol ? Nightclubs ?

When Baekhyun's stressed he just draws with his playlist playing in the background and a strawberry milkshake on the side. He grew up in a loving family, a sane universe for a kid to grow up and become an adult living a stable life. He didn't particularly fancy going to clubs but he sure goes from time to time to dance. He loves dancing and that's why he went to clubs multiple times with Jongin or even Jongdae.

He doesn't have addictions, quit smoking in college, likes a fine old whiskey when he needs to relieve stress in a bar after work. Oh, well he is addicted to everything that taste like strawberry.

But Chanyeol...Chanyeol only found solace in the night life and Baekhyun can't blame him for that. He really wanted to tackle the subject tonight but he didn't want to ruin the date.

Chanyeol was smiling and to Baekhyun it was a beautiful sight. He's tired of seeing the giant gloomy and in tears.

And right now he's the one who's grinning like an idiot as his screen lights up with Chanyeol's name.

 

 _Thank you for being a lovely  
_ _date. And for listening to me,  
_ _for validating my struggles.  
_ _I hope I can give it back to  
_ _you in the most beautiful  
_ _ways. Even just as friends.  
_ _Good night Baekhyunnie._

 

 

 _No Chanyeol, you made this  
_ _date enjoyable. You opened  
_ _up to me and let me see  
_ _the things that hurt you the  
_ _most. It's beautiful to be able  
_ _to do that.  
L_ _ove yourself more.  
_ _When you do that, you won't  
_ _have to feel sad anymore  
_ _because you'll have yourself.  
_ _Sometimes happiness isn't  
_ _someone else, or a job, or a  
_ _dream. Sometimes it's about  
_ _giving yourself the love you  
_ _deserve._

_Sleep well Chanyeollie :)_

 

 

 

Baekhyun gulps his coffee down and doesn't even lift his eyes to meet Jongdae's smirk. His best friend is leaning against the wall of the meeting room and waits for the last employee to leave before he speaks.

His phone vibrates and he smiles as he reads a text message from Chanyeol. All that attention after being single for so long is refreshing.

“Don't tell me...It's from your rich boyfriend.”

Baekhyun glares at him then types a quick reply. “Why aren't you working ?”

“I need the designs dumbass, so I can send the textile orders ASAP.”

He gestures for the samples on the table of the meeting room. “It's here.”

Jongdae grabs it but can't quite leave without obtaining a little bit of gossip. He hasn't heard of Chanyeol again since three days ago and Baekhyun seemed a little cold to him after their last phonecall. They had been so busy the past few days to finalize the new collection that they couldn't even talk at work like they usually would.

“What is he saying ?”

Baekhyun tries his best to hide a smile, pleased that the one who rained on his parade the other day suddenly needs to know all the details.

“You're interested now ?”

Jongdae purses his lips cutely. “Baekhyun-ah, I only root for your happiness and if your happiness is a chaebol I have nothing to say but to support your choices.”

He laughs, his little scheme to deprive Jongdae of attention really works everytime.

“I almost teared up Dae.”

He grimaces, “Right ? I should have become an actor, why did I even pursue a fashion major ?”

They take the direction of the workshop and Jongdae isn't giving up. “Spill the tea, what does Park Chanyeol say to you since the date ?”

Baekhyun grins and realizes that if he had to tell Jongdae truly, it'd be too long because they hadn't stopped texting since the date. Chanyeol cares to always message Baekhyun to tell about his day, to read about Baekhyun's stress from their new collection and they have started this new routine of asking random questions to get to know each other more.

What is your favorite color ? Your favorite dish ? Your favorite movie ?

And Chanyeol had just texted with another question that Baekhyun had been waiting for.

“He asked me on another date.”

Jongdae's thrilled. “You really snatched his heart Byun Baekhyun.”

Baekhyun sits down at his desk, he's a little embarrassed. “I wish I didn't to be honest.”

He really can't forget that if Chanyeol had grown up in a modest family, he wouldn't be so scared to fall for him. And Baekhyun hated more than anything to be fearful, to be too cautious. He didn't want to refuse what life had to offer.

It could be unexpected.

Jongdae puts the samples he was carrying on the desk and sits on the edge, seriously concerned by Baekhyun's sad expression suddenly.

“Refusing yourself love is finishing the job for all your exes who stole happiness from you. Do yourself a favor and give him a chance, he's in love already.”

Baekhyun laughs. “What a funny analogy really, I kind of used the same one to him but instead of exes it was about his parents.”

Jongdae throws his hands in the air dramatically.

“The blind leading the blind.”

Baekhyun scans his face and it worries Jongdae a little. “What ? You want my new skincare routine ?”

“Why are you so supportive now ? Four days ago you were lecturing me on why it was a bad idea...”

He crossed his arms and smiles. “You need to find yourself a boyfriend because I'm not ending this year single and sexually frustrated.”

“So far I'm the only one with a candidate though.” Baekhyun laughs but when his best friend whistles playfully he knows he's been missing out.

“Who is it ? He must be working here because you spend all your free time with me.”

Jongdae stands up and wiggles his hips and it puts a huge grin on Baekhyun's face.

“We both work with him...”

Baekhyun is too stunned to process when suddenly Kim Minseok comes in the workshop and makes his way to the wall where all of the sketches for the new collection are displayed. He's wearing a tailored italian three piece suit and his hair is neatly styled in the way that compliments his face, black locks parted on both sides.

He's on the phone, he's loud and when he's done ordering someone at the other end of the line he turns around and looks at both Jongdae and Baekhyun, then focuses on Jongdae.

“Kim Jongdae, did you send the textile samples for each design yet ?”

Firm, cold, intransigent.

“I'm on my way, sir.” He grabs the samples and before he leaves, he whispers for only them to hear, “I'll make him mine no matter what.”

Baekhyun really didn't expect his best friend to lust after Kim Minseok, the head designer and technically, their boss.

 

 

Baekhyun wets his lips nervously, his eyes fixated on the heart design drawn on the foam of his latte. He wonders if Chanyeol asked for it or if the barista took the liberty himself...

He scratches his head and tries to appear cool and composed when the dark haired comes back with his own order, an iced americano.

Baekhyun smiles, really Chanyeol is unusual.

“Won't you feel cold drinking that on this freezing weather ?”

His goofy grin.

He's wearing a creamy turtleneck and Baekhun loses himself in him like he did for the foam of his latte earlier.

“Not at all. I'm always warm.”

Right, Baekhyun would like to find out.

“You're lucky, I always get cold.”

Chanyeol wonders if Baekhyun knows that whenever he complains, his mouth turns in a pout and it's the most adorable sight he's seen. It always calls for his lips and he fights the urge desperately.

“It's the right time for a pick up line but I'm sparing you.”

He laughs and at that Chanyeol swears he looked ten times prettier. “Try me, we never know I might fall for you.”

Chanyeol wants to say he's lost, he's already fallen for Baekhyun.

“You might just run away.”

“I love a little swooning.”

Chanyeol nods, “Noted.”

He's nervous and it's easier talking to Baekhyun through a screen, they'd been a lot more talkative by messages than when they are face to face.

He needs to start somewhere, anywhere.

“I have an appointment with a therapist tomorrow.”

Baekhyun looks surprised but soon he gifts Chanyeol a huge smile. “I'm proud of you.”

He really is and seeing Chanyeol trying to heal from his past is the most rewarding act he could offer. He is ready to recover and ready to progress towards a life he could choose.

It was brave.

“I could do it thanks to you Baekhyunnie.”

“I only suggested it but you achieved it.”

Chanyeol shakes his head. “You don't know how helpful you've been.”

Baekhyun tilts his head, he bites his lower lip softly like he's hesitating but finally decides it's about time he confronts Chanyeol about it. He knows it's one of the reasons why he didn't want to go further with him. He wants to be sure.

“When was the last time you've been high ?”

Chanyeol looks surprised, his lips between his straw. He takes a last long sip. “It's been a week I think.”

He nods, it was coincident with their first date.

There's a part of Baekhyun who wants to elaborate on the drugs and the fact he really is not fond of having a boyfriend addicted to that. But he reminds himself, right there, that he has no authority on anyone's life. He isn't a control freak but it still concerns him, he wonders why but when Chanyeol covers his hand for few seconds he knows.

_I care for you, you stupid._

_I think I've always did._

“Don't worry, I won't go back to drugs. Actually, I'm taking meds to lower the withdrawal symptoms because even if I wasn't a hardcore consumer, I turned to it a bit too much during the last weeks.”

He sees Baekhyun nodding. He wants to add more. Just a little more.

“I don't want to ruin my chances with you. I'm really serious about you Baekhyun.”

He can't hold his gaze anymore, he smiles awkwardly and looks outside the window. It's getting dark outside, he can almost smell the tteobokki this ahjumma is selling.

“I don't want you to do that for me.”

Chanyeol wonders what Baekhyun is looking at, outside. But his gaze still won't leave him. The fairy lights outside from the street vendor are sparkling in his eyes.

“Do it for yourself Chanyeol. Not for me. I'm optional, you're stuck with yourself for a lifetime.”

Baekhyun was really awakening the risk taker inside who had been sleeping for too long.

“Well maybe you'll be stuck with me for a lifetime too.”

Baekhyun looks back, finally. Chanyeol knows it was a bold move but there was no need for pretending, he was courting Baekhyun.

He could feel remorse making its way but after what seemed like an eternity, Baekhyun grinned. “When I said I like a little swooning you really listened.”

“To you ? Always.”

Chanyeol wet his lips, tried to show nothing but confidence but no matter what Baekhyun was troubling him.

“Any plans tomorrow night ?”

Baekhyun's impressed, really Chanyeol didn't want to lose any opportunity for another date althought they already were in the middle of one. The eagerness was cute but a little suffocating maybe.

“It's usually movie night with Jongdae.”

Chanyeol's face falls a little but he quickly smiles to hide it. Baekhyun sees it all.

“Depends on what you have to offer ?”

Chanyeol shakes his hands in front of him, he's embarrassed. “It's nothing Baekhyun, it's alright, do what you usually do.”

He pouts, he hates himself for not letting Chanyeol propose whatever he had in mind. It's ridiculous. It feels like he hurt his feelings.

“Tell me Chanyeol, I hate it when someone leaves me hanging.”

He scratches his head, looks outside. Part of himself begs to let it go but...It'd be wonderful to have Baekhyun here, especially on this day, for once.

“Jongin's throwing a party at my place. You can come with your friend Jongdae, if you want.”

Baekhyun smiles. “We've been staying home too much on friday nights, we look like an old couple, I think it'll be fine to accept your invitation.”

Chanyeol's relieved, he's been blessed by Baekhyun accepting a date and he'll be seeing him more the day after. He used to avoid him like the plague but now he's finding every way to spend more time with him.

It's 8pm when they both get home. Chanyeol types a quick message to Baekhyun and wonders how he's going to cope with his friends doing drugs right in front of his crush...

 _  
Happy that you'll come tomorrow.  
_ _Please, don't bring anything, we'll  
_ _be loaded with food and drinks.  
_ _I just want you there.  
_ _See you tomorrow._

 

 

Baekhyun finds Jongdae in the kitchen not far from the workshop the day after, he hasn't been able to see his best friend all morning to tell him about Chanyeol's party.

He opens the door and laughs when Jongdae chokes, startled by the sudden intrusion while he was stuffing himself with a spoon of rice.

“You're not even waiting for me, traitor.”

His best friend swallows painfully and reaches for his glass of water. “I nearly passed out because of you !”

“Serves you right, you usually ring me for lunch.”

Jongdae rolls his eyes. “So we're at this stage of our relationship now ?”

Baekhyun pouts. “I thought so but turns out you're a selfish bitch. I looked for you in the cafeteria, why don't you eat there ?”

Jongdae shrugs. “More like I'm hiding because someone will probably fire my ass soon.”

Baekhyun sits down, concerned. “What the hell did you do ?”

He laughs but quickly slaps himself, really what was he thinking, it's not funny, he'll probably be homeless soon and will have to live with Baekhyun and he hates sleeping with him because he's so noisy and...

“I made a move on Kim Minseok.”

Baekhyun slammed his palms on the table, dramatically. Yes it was dramatic, it was their boss, the barking puddle who'd tyranize everyone for the slightest reason, even if you breathed too loudly after storming in the meeting room because you were late and the elevator didn't work so you had to take the stairs and nearly tripped out there from rushing – yes it happened to Byun Baekhyun once – and there was no way that this Kim Minseok would be a forgiving soul.

No way.

“You are so fucked Dae. You are dead meat.”

He laughed nervously. “I know, I mean, look ? I'm fabulously dressed and I'm hiding, what's wrong with me today ??! Nothing, I only sexually harassed my boss.”

Baekhyun frowned. “Wait, what did you do ?”

He sighs and still eats, there's nothing that will stop him to eat not even the perspective of being fired. So he speaks, mouth full and Baekhyun can see grains of rice flying out from his mouth, he grimaces and stands up before Jongdae decorates his jacket.

“I was in the textiles room and he came to ask me if we received the materials for the spring and summer dresses, I was unpacking them.”

Baekhyun tilts his head to encourage his friend to go on.

“And I suggested to order more of the pastel prints from our Chinese supplier because I have contacts – you know Zitao's my friend and he models for all the Chinese and international brands and he did a little bit of spying for me which means he sleeps around a lot – and I told the boss that other brands were focusing on the pastel trend for the Spring/Summer campaign.”

Baekhyun's static. “And ?”

“And he thanked me, said that I should order more, that I'm a good buyer and he patted my shoulder, you should have seen the way he smiled at me...and I don't know why I kissed him, I mean he was so close and so handsome, his skin is flawless, his lips were so inviting and I kissed him. I freaking kissed Kim Minseok !”

Baekhyun is facepalming and Jongdae realizes the stupidity of his own actions. He expected Baekhyun to at least minimize the outcome but he's the epitome of desperation ?

“I can't believe you assaulted him.”

Jongdae frowns, hurt. “Assaulted ?! Aren't you being a little bit dramatic ?”

“You didn't ask for consent, therefore, it's assault.”

Jongdae laughs hysterically. “But when it's Park Chanyeol assaulting you it's fine ?”

Baekhyun opens his mouth, utterly shocked by the low attack his best friend is sending his way. “Kim Minseok is our boss not Jongin's childhood best friend !”

Jongdae crosses his arms and sulks. “Fuck you okay, I feel horrible but you don't even comfort me.”

He laughs, he can't believe it. “You put yourself in trouble, what do you want me to do ? Kiss Kim Minseok too so we're both fired ?”

“Something like that.”

Baekhyun laughs. “He's got too much of a temper for me.”

“A temper in bed is fine but outside of it it's not my kink.” Jongdae sighs and Baekhyun chuckles.

“You'll probably find yourself a chaebol to play with in bed tonight, we're invited at Chanyeol's, Jongin's throwing a party.”

Jongdae's eyebrows raise, he's genuinely surprised. “I'm invited ?”

Baekhyun nods. “Chanyeol told me to bring you along but to be honest you'd be invited anyway considering Jongin's the one organizing it.”

“I'm actually excited to see you both interacting now that there's a mutual interest. You were so awkward the few times I was around before.”

Baekhyun stretches himself up, a loud moan passes his lips and he prepares himself to leave as his stomach is reminding him to go to the cafeteria to eat. He is about to let Jongdae know when the door opens and a frowning Kim Minseok appears.

He spots Baekhyun first then Jongdae and Baekhyun takes it as his cue to leave for good. He really doesn't want to be in the middle of that storm.

He sends a mute _FIGHTING_ to Jongdae, his fist in the air and quickly shuts the door.

 

They find each other later when Jongdae comes to fetch him with his car to get to Chanyeol's party. Baekhyun's wearing black skinny jeans, a striped blazer and a leather belt cinching his waist. The silk shirt underneath is unbuttoned and Jongdae's fits of laughter won't stop even when his best friend tells him to shut up.

“That's some cleavage !”

“Fuck you. I don't know why you're so loud.”

Jongdae can't stop laughing and hitting the steering wheel. “Between the eyeliner and the man tits out, Byun Baekhyun wants to get laid tonight.”

“I swear to God Kim Jongdae if you're not driving now I'm calling Kim Minseok and telling him you jerk off to the thought of him.”

“How do you know ??”

He starts the engine and makes an effort to calm down. “For real, I haven't seen you dressed like this in a while. Last time you did, you were hooking up with a bunch of guys after you got dumped.”

Baekhyun rolls his eyes. “You know it's gonna be packed with all these rich kids and I hate them. Might as well impress them with my looks since I don't have their money.”

Jongdae isn't buying it. “I think you just want to impress Chanyeol's dick.”

He yells at the strong slap on his arm. Baekhyun's a bitch when he's teased on the truth. Jongdae whines loudly. “You really can't take a joke !”

“Anyway, are you now jobless ? Do I have to ask Jongin to pull some strings so he can help you find a new job ?”

Jongdae grins. And it means that he isn't fired, which really surprises Baekhyun.

“I have a date tomorrow actually so you won't get rid of me at work.”

Baekhyun's eyes pops, he's stunned by the revelation. “Are you fucking serious ?? YOU have a date with Kim Minseok ? No way !”

Jongdae shows nothing but a smile, that cocky one when he's proud of himself and it drives Baekhyun crazy because this man always gets himself out of the craziest situations. Even with kissing his scary insufferable boss.

“You really are one of the bravest. I hope he doesn't fire you if things go wrong.”

Jongdae's expression falters a little. “Don't be so negative.”

“You know how it feels now. Can't let you get ahead of yourself, it's just a date.”

They reach Gangnam on time, thankfully the traffic wasn't so bad at this hour of the night. Jongdae is impressed by the undeground parking lot of the huge apartment complexes. He whines at the sight of luxury car brands everywhere and gently pats his own. “I'm sorry, don't feel out of place, you belong here as much as them.”

Baekhyun chuckles. “Are you really talking to your car ?”

“I talk to her all the time, she has a soul you know.”

They ride the elevator and when they reach Chanyeol's door, Baekhyun shows first signs of nervousness. Jongdae realizes he's been hiding it all until now. He keeps straightening his striped jacket, checking his hair on the screen of his smartphone and even wipes out his palms on his black skinny jeans.

“You look sexy as fuck, stop that already.”

Baekhyun shakes his head a little. “I'm just stressed, I hate how they make me feel small and insignificant.”

Jongdae pats his back then proceeds to ring the door. “Don't let them see it. Show nothing but confidence and charisma, it's the only way to unsettle them.”

Baekhyun really thought he was fine until the door opened and there is standing Chanyeol with his signature coma hair, in a deep blue velvet jacket, a slightly unbuttoned white shirt and black dress pants. At the sight of Baekhyun, he gifts his guests with a huge grin.

Baekhyun is speechless because he has never seen Chanyeol so elegant and handsome. Or maybe he did once but things are different.

He notices Chanyeol now.

Jongdae saves the moment. “Thank you for inviting us Chanyeol. Happy to meet you again.”

Chanyeol shakes his hands. “Don't mention it, I'm the one who's happy to have you here. Please come in.”

Jongdae gets rid of his sneakers and marvels at the designer shoes already stacked on a shelf. It's a blessing he doesn't need to wear shoes inside because he's well aware how much rich people always look at your shoes and your watch to see if you match their level.

So much for being judgemental.

He's offered a pair of reusable slippers Chanyeol takes out and when he turns around he finds both Baekhyun and Chanyeol in a staring contest. He rolls his eyes, unsure about what to do next. He doesn't fancy exploring Chanyeol's apartment alone with a sea of chaebols who will inevitably stare and at the same time he feels like he's intruding on the two idiots eye fucking each other...

“You look stunning. I've never seen you like that, not even the few times you were at the club with us.”

Baekhyun hates himself for blushing like a school girl but he can't help it. Chanyeol looks seriously affected by his outfit and Baekhyun almost regrets showing off.

“You look very good too Chanyeol. Very elegant.”

Chanyeol dismisses him. “I don't want to be jealous tonight but I'm positive that I'll have to keep an eye on you. There are a few sharks out there.”

Baekhyun grabs the pair of slippers and smiles. “Well, they can look but they can't bite.”

He doesn't know from where comes the extra confidence Baekhyun is exuding but it does things to his body and he needs to grab a drink as soon as possible because Chanyeol junior might want to have a little party of his own.

He focuses on Jongdae who's standing there like he wants to die on the spot and shows the way. They leave the entrance and a right turn lead them into the spacious living room with a view on the city's lights.

There's music in the background, not too loud, not too low. The open kitchen counter is full of drinks and finger food. There's a huge bucket full of champagne, vodka and wine bottles. It really exceeded their expectations when Chanyeol said to come empty handed because there will be enough to drink and eat.

There's more on a table in the living room near the wall. Cocktails of all sorts that one of Chanyeol's guest is preparing diligently while he chats with other chaebols.

There's a few women but they clearly don't look like they belong to their social circle. Baekhyun suspects them to be entertainers for the night or even mistresses for some.

The atmosphere in the living room is really special, it isn't welcoming or warm, it feels distant and chic.

A few heads turn and Baekhyun feel the piercing gazes on his body. He knows he's being read, he's being preyed on even by some. It's troubling but he keeps his composure. Jongdae's right, he needs to show them they're not a big deal.

“Baekhyun hyung ! Jongdae hyung !”

It's Jongin. He's breaking through from a group of chaebols in the middle of the living room. He's holding a glass of champagne and his red silk shirt is unbuttoned almost all the way. He's displaying firm pecs and the beginning of his abs. Jongin's been molded by God in every perfect way. He's smiling so much it's contagious.

“Jonginnie, how have you been ?”

Baekhyun's crushed in a half hug and Jongin almost spills some champagne on Jongdae who's standing near them. Chanyeol scolds him a little but Jongin then hugs Jongdae energetically too. “I missed you guys a lot.”

He's already tipsy and steals all the attention Chanyeol wanted. “Baekhyun hyung, why are you so hot tonight ?!”

That's it Chanyeol starts to get irritated. Baekhyun laughs. “What do you mean ? I've always been hot.”

“No but for real ! You look so good, if I didn't have Taemin I'd definitely date you.”

Now Baekhyun wants to dig a hole and hide in it forever because Jongin is loud and they have most of the guests's attention. The positive outcome is that Taemin shows up at the mention of his name and of his lover obviously flirting a little. Baekhyun's stunned by Jongin's boyfriend, his body is no joke and tonight he is wearing a see-through black shirt and tight jeans. Baekhyun feels intimidated by Taemin's stare as he's scanned from head to toes.

“If you're into threesomes Baekhyun, let us know...”

Jongin's taken away and keeps mouthing to Baekhyun to let them know. Jongdae's at a loss for words because he was scared of Taemin starting drama but certainly not to give a menage a trois offer.

But the one who's truly shaken up is Chanyeol. He realizes that not only Baekhyun is the prey of most of his guests but now also Jongin wants a piece of cake.

“Are you alright ?”

Baekhyun laughs at the question, his face gave him away. “I shouldn't have put on eyeliner I guess.”

Jongdae can't help but tease. “Oh believe me it's not the eyeliner Baekhyun.”

Chanyeol was about to offer them a drink when he hears a familiar voice call his name in the entrance. They all turn around and he recognizes one of his highschool friend, Oh Sehun who opens up his arms wide and yells loudly “HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHANYEOL-AH !”.

That's when Baekhyun experiences a mental breakdown. He looks over at Jongdae who looks as surprised as he is.

“It's his birthday ? You didn't tell me !”

“You think that I knew ? Because I don't !” Baekhyun whispers back with a panicked expression. He's so ashamed to have showed up without a gift. He didn't even ask his birth date at all.

He doesn't even have time to process it all because Chanyeol is introducing them to another one of his childhood friend, Sehun.

When Chanyeol is called by a group of friends at the back of the living room, Baekhyun takes the opportunity to hold his arm to prevent him from leaving. Sehun is already on his way to join them and at the urgency in Baekhyun's eyes, he understands that he needs to stay back.

“Sehunnie I'm coming in a minute !”

He looks back at Baekhyun who's suddenly sulking. “What's wrong ?”

He's fuming and Jongdae takes it as his cue to leave them alone. He's caught by an ex he hooked up with once in the past, Ravi, a friend of Jongin they met in a club one wild night out.

“Chanyeol are you seriously asking me what's wrong ?”

He's dumbfounded, searching for the reason why Baekhyun looks mad all of sudden.

“I-...Baekhyun I'm sorry if you feel uncomfortable because of Taemin and Jongin or if it's my friends in general...”

Baekhyun points a finger at his chest. He notes down that it's firm and his head definitely would be comfortable there but he quickly focuses back on the situation and doesn't let Chanyeol see anything.

“I am unfomfortable because of you right now. Because you thought it was a great idea to invite me to this party without telling me it's your birthday. And now I look pretty stupid, showing up here thinking it's just a regular party but the worst is that I don't even have a birthday gift for you.”

Chanyeol looks relieved and his expression softens. He grabs one of Baekhyun's hand and gives a goofy smile. “I don't care about my birthday, it's never been special. And your presence tonight is a gift alone so stop overthinking it, just see it as a regular party.”

“But-”

Chanyeol puts his hand on Baekhyun's arm and it's enough to shut him up. “It's just Jongin who acted on a whim, you know how he is. He always insists to hold a party but it's an excuse to get high.”

Baekhyun can't help but feel an immense sadness for Chanyeol. He is genuinely concerned that someone wouldn't want to celebrate his birthday or feel special enough to hold a party for it. It breaks his heart that Chanyeol is so unbothered by something significant for others.

“Grab a drink and survive, I'll get to you later.”

He's left alone just like that and pours himself a glass of champagne. He observes Chanyeol who laughs at someone's words and he hopes that he's not faking it for the night. He truly wants and desires to see Chanyeol happy.

For the right reasons.

Jongin shows up with an empty glass that he fills up.

“You could have told me that it's his birthday today.”

Jongin pouts. “I thought you knew hyung.”

Baekhyun shakes his head.

“You know he never celebrates his birthdays usually. So it's an improvement that he let me organize this party for him.”

It soothes Baekhyun's heart a little.

“What kind of present can I get an heir who can afford absolutely anything and everything ?”

Jongin looks at Baekhyun a bit suspicious. “I didn't know you guys exchanged gifts.”

Baekhyun doesn't know what to say, he realizes Jongin's in the dark about the whole situation between him and Chanyeol. He feels a little guilty even because it's Jongin who made them meet.

“Chanyeol hyung talks a lot about you these days...Are you guys getting close ?”

Baekhyun chuckles nervously. The direct question makes him shy, almost. He usually doesn't discuss heart matters with Jongin unless his dongsaeng starts complaining that he had an argument with Taemin and that he needs to vent.

But telling straight away that yes, he wouldn't mind dating Chanyeol, his childhood best friend ? Baekhyun is baffled by his own mind. Yes he wouldn't mind dating Chanyeol, it's true...If only things were less complicated, if only Chanyeol wasn't a chaebol, Baekhyun wouldn't torture himself everyday with doubts.

“We are getting to know each other if that's what you mean, yes.”

Jongin gives a heartfelt smile. It's genuine and for a second Baekhyun mirrors his expression. He doesn't see Chanyeol staring from the back of the living room, a bit scared that Jongin's working his charm on his crush.

“I'm very happy about that hyung. In fact, when I introduced you both to each other, I was hoping to be a matchmaker.”

Baekhyun's taken aback by the revelation. “Are you serious ?”

“I swear hyung, you can ask Taemin, I told him you guys would make a beautiful couple. But then you two were so awkward everytime we met so I lost hope.”

For a moment Baekhyun looks over at Chanyeol, he's busy laughing with his friends. He is especially handsome when he wears happiness. It was hard to get closer to him and unexpected. He remembers that day when Chanyeol came all high and drunk, so broken and needy for affection.

“Chanyeol opened up to me in the most surprising ways. I hope he keeps doing it even if we only stay friends.”

Jongin really wants to reply his hyung that he's not good at lying. Even now, in the way he keeps looking at Chanyeol with a faint smile on his lips, he can see that Baekhyun sees Chanyeol differently now. And it's not a way to be looking at your friend. Not at all.

“About the gift, Chanyeol hyung isn't a materialist. Give him something meaningful. Something he can't buy.”

He walks away and gives Baekhyun no clue at all. He's standing there with champagne, unable to come up with a gift for Chanyeol. He really regrets not asking more specific questions about his tastes.

“What's with the long face ?”

Jongdae's back, thankfully. “I'm sad because I didn't get him a present.”

His best friend laughs. “Just get naked and say you're his birthday gift I can guarantee you he's gonna like it more than a Lamborghini.”

Baekhyun glares. “Weren't you talking to that chaebol who's stupid but with a big dick ?”

Jongdae laughs. “You remember Ravi ?”

“Dae, after you left the club, you called me drunk later that night to say he was huge.”

He grimaces at that. “I really need to stop drinking so much on nights out.”

“What does he want from you anyway ?”

Jongdae takes a sip and grins. “He'd like to play a game of chess with me again.”

Baekhyun almost spills champagne. “What did you say ?”

He looks offended that his best friend is even asking. “I refused what do you take me for ?!”

“A hoe. I take you for a hoe.”

Jongdae scoffs and puts his Metropolitan on the counter. “I might get some vitamin D when I'm in need of it but may I remind you that I have a crush on our boss and I'm not getting any other vitamin D than his.”

Baekhyun laughs at that. He starts drinking a lot to loosen up a little and eventually finds himself unable to keep up the same rhythm because the alcohol is kicking in strongly. He excuses himself from Jongdae and that chaebol who's trying to hook up once again with his best friend and reaches the handle that leads to the outdoor terrace for some air and now he's getting drunk on the night view of Seoul and its tiny sparkly lights everywhere. He looks up and sees no stars. He exhales into the cold november night, the alcohol makes him too dizzy to care. But he's too hot, drinks after drinks Baekhyun stopped caring about being surrounded by chaebols. He even joked with some of them until he was too hot and was gasping for air.

He is content with the way things are going tonight except for Chanyeol's absence. His friends keep him busy and Baekhyun doesn't dare go up to him because he's around far more intimidating heirs. Jongin told him that all of Chanyeol's closest friends were sons of the biggest conglomerates in South Korea. And they did give off that expensive and unattainable aura even just from a distance.

Chanyeol grew up with them, they all went to the same private schools and they all studied in the most prestigious universities.

And Baekhyun felt almost cheap when he tried to take a step or two towards their little bubble but in the end, he stayed around familiar faces.

“That's why I hate chaebols.”

He says out loud into the night.

“I hate you all.” He laughs drunkenly. “Who do you think you are ? Special snowflakes ? This was winning at life's lottery but it doesn't mean you have to look down on others.”

“I don't look down on you.”

Baekhyun turns around abruptly at the sound of his deep voice.

There he is.

The man that he wants to see the most tonight.

“I don't look down on anyone.”

Baekhyun smiles sheepishly. “I know that.”

Chanyeol removes his velvet jacket and puts it over Baekhyun's shoulder. “I'm sorry if my friends make you uncomfortable.”

“It's alright. The fact that you're here makes me feel better.”

He's beaming at the words and settles next to Baekhyun on the railing. They're standing together, admiring the view, arms touching. Chanyeol wants more but it's not a safe move without Baekhyun's consent or the fact that behind the glass door there are too many witnesses. He is a little scared some things might reach his father. So he stays still and regrets having to be a little distant tonight.

He hugs the jacket draped over his shoulders a little closer and glances at Chanyeol who's frowning a little.

“What are you concerned with ?”

He doesn't reply right away, he doesn't even look at Baekhyun at the question. Chanyeol's focused on trying to come up with a satisfying answer to this, the last thing he wants is to scare Baekhyun away. He is stunned even that the other is still sticking by his side.

“I don't even understand why you're so willing to go on dates with me, to give me a chance when you know that maybe you can't have a future with me.”

The air grows heavy suddenly and Baekhyun who came out for air is gasping. He is at a loss for words because the progress they made until now really is going down the drain. What triggered Chanyeol tonight ?

He isn't sure.

“You see Chanyeol, the difference between you and me is that you overthink things while I take the leap.”

He laughs bitterly.

“Say it then, that I'm a coward.”

Chanyeol feels like a defused bomb as soon as Baekhyun grabs his hand. No one can see by their closeness, thankfully. Baekhyun starts stroking the back of his hand, it's soft and full of affection, that, Chanyeol can tell.

“Stop sabotaging yourself Chanyeol-ah. Give yourself some love.”

His eyes are full of unshed tears. Baekhyun wants to kiss him right here, right now but he's scared that it's not for the right reason.

Does he feel pity ? Does he believe that he can heal Chanyeol's broken soul ? Baekhyun's lost and the alcohol isn't helping at all.

“You're really the most handsome when you smile.”

Chanyeol looks at Baekhyun, finally. “Come back inside wearing one, please.”

Baekhyun then puts back the velvet jacket on Chanyeol's shoulders and when the glass door closes, there's only a single tear falling down his cheek but Chanyeol's smiling sincerely.

When he comes back inside, Chanyeol finds Baekhyun surrounded by some of his closest friends. He's smiling and chatting like he belongs here. He is a bit scared of the outcome so he joins them quickly, his ears perking up.

“You're really handsome. 

Baekhyun blushes furiously at that. “You look very good too.”

Chanyeol wants to die on the spot because he doesn't know how to get Sehun away from Baekhyun without being dramatic about it. They aren't dating and he has no right to meddle there. He's saved by Junmyeon though.

“Sehunnie, stop hitting on Chanyeol's friend will you ? May I remind you that you're supposed to get married to my cousin next year ?”

Sehun pouts at that. “I'm considered single until we throw the engagement party next month though. I'm sure she is making the best of it until that day.”

Baekhyun can't believe his ears. “I don't flirt with taken people.”

Junmyeon chuckles and so does Kyungsoo, the one with a heart shaped smile. Chanyeol feels beyond relieved.

“Are you single Baekhyun ?”

Junmyeon is bewitching and Baekhyun is a bit shy at the question. He finds it weird though because if Junmyeon is into men too, he isn't sure about his preference. He sees him more like a friend rather than a potential boyfriend.

“I could say so.”

Junmyeon raises an eyebrow. “But ?”

“But I'm getting to know someone, we've been on dates...I am not really on the market.”

Chanyeol is sweating a lot on the side, trying to act cool but he downs his glass of champagne like there's no tomorrow.

Kyungsoo is observing everyone like he's bored but registering every tiny information he gets from the whole situation. Junmyeon laughs, pushes the strand of hair that fell on his eye. Baekhyun is sure that he isn't funny right now so he wonders why the other is reacting this way.

“So if you're not really on the market, you're either sold or reserved.”

Baekhyun opens his mouth but makes no sound. He is absolutely speechless how Junmyeon cornered him and in front of Chanyeol at that.

Kyungsoo's eyes go from Chanyeol who's flustered to Baekhyun experiencing a brain freeze.

“I'm in the storage room.”

Baekhyun curses himself out internally. He panicked. _That's the smartest you came up with, great Byun Baekhyun..._

Junmyeon laughs more and this time so does Kyungsoo. Sehun is standing there clueless and looks at Chanyeol for an answer but his friend is downing a vodka shot.

“So it means you can be bought if a customer wants you but can't find you on the stalls ?” Sehun gets frustrated.

“So you're reserved ?”

Junmyeon shakes his hand in front of Kyungsoo. “No he is buyable only if the price is high enough.”

Sehun frowns. “The seller makes the price, not the product itself.”

“Are you really the son of a conglomerate Hunnie ? How can you be so stupid ?” Junmyeon is really judging him right now.

Sehun is clearly offended at that. “Listen, I only sign the papers, I have no freaking idea about what my employees do everyday.”

“Market price, does it ring a bell to you ?”

The revelation brings light onto his face and he smiles like he just discovered that the earth isn't flat.

“Oh that's what you meant ? Of course I know about it, I'm not stupid.”

Junmyeon isn't sure about that because he should have thought about it first and foremost. But he's not surprised, Sehun really isn't the brain of their group of friends and thankfully for him he is rich because he wouldn't be with such intellectual capacities.

“So what's the price for you Baekhyun ?”

He thought that he could get out of it thanks to Sehun but Baekhyun is once again the center of attention. He looks over his shoulder to see where are Jongdae and Jongin but his eyes fall on Chanyeol who's stuffing himself with the caviar canapes and he suddenly chokes on them.

Kyungsoo hands him out a napkin and Baekhyun holds his arm, genuinely concerned.

“Chanyeol-ah, are you alright ?”

He coughs some more and drinks to push it down, his face a little red. He reassures them by nodding and takes the opportunity to leave and check himself out in the bathroom mirror just in case he has bits of caviar on his outfit after spitting out half of it.

Baekhyun is a bit concerned but Junmyeon makes sure he doesn't forget what he's been asked. Baekhyun wonders why he is so interested by his love life, he isn't really thrilled by the thought of having more chaebols after him, Chanyeol already makes him anxious, besides he really isn't interested in anyone else.

Right here. He realizes that his whole attention is on Chanyeol. There's no one here who would steal his attention, as gorgeous as some of them can be. He really only thinks of Chanyeol.

“You're right”, he tells Kyungsoo. “I'm reserved.”

When Chanyeol returns, Baekhyun's gone and is having a chat with Taemin on the couch. Chanyeol hopes that he's not considering a threesome with him and Jongin but he doesn't have time to dwell on it as Junmyeon grabs his arms and Kyungsoo looks at him suspiciously.

Sehun is on the phone with his future spouse but he seems to be focused on what's happening here rather than the choice of flowers for the engagement party.

“So...?”

Chanyeol is lost. “So what ?”

Kyungsoo and Junmyeon exchange a knowing smile.

“So when are you making a move on Baekhyun ?"

He laughs nervously and tries to escape Junmyeon's grip but they trap him against the wall.

“I can't believe you thought we wouldn't notice. We grew up with you.”

“You can't lie to save your life Chanyeol.”

He's busted and there's nothing he can do to cover it up. Really nothing but to plead for his case.

“Guys, I'm sorry for not being honest but I am begging you not to let this spread. Baekhyun isn't fond of our circle and I'd rather not let him be the target of my father.”

Junmyeon slaps his head and Kyungsoo punches his shoulder. The two simultaneously turn their heads at Sehun and at first he's confused but soon he kicks Chanyeol in the shin. This one yells loudly and looks like an angry kid fighting with his classmates from kindergarten. From the couch Baekhyun looks but doesn't intervene. He can't hear what Chanyeol is saying after screaming.

“Why are you hitting me ?!”

Junmyeon crosses his arms, a bit sulky. “You don't even trust us ? We know everything about you Chanyeol but you really think we are going to tell on you ? So far, we've only been protecting you. Even that one time you were seen kissing a man ? We made sure it wouldn't reach your father's ears.”

Chanyeol is speechless. The people he thought were barely childhood friends and business connections turned out to be more than that. They were almost like brothers to him right now. No, they truly were. And until today, he didn't know.

His heart swells with emotion and he finds himself almost crying but Kyungsoo is quick to hand a napkin, again. Chanyeol turns his back to the guests and presses the tissue on his wet lower lash line.

He is utterly touched by the unexpected proof of love he's just received and he feels guilty for doubting his friends.

“I'm so sorry guys...I didn't know.”

Kyungsoo rolls his eyes. “We figured.”

He then forces them all into a group hug and this time Junmyeon tries to push Chanyeol away but he's too strong. Sehun is laughing while his future fiancé is screaming at him that he's not listening, Kyungsoo is asking for air because he's sandwiched in the middle.

From the couch, this time, Baekhyun smiles thinking that Chanyeol emanates happiness, finally.

 

 

It's 4am and Jongdae throws in the sink the last content of alcohol found in the last glass. Baekhyun brings another empty bottle of champagne on the kitchen counter. They stayed behind to clean up the most they could so that Chanyeol's maid wouldn't have too much work the day after.

Chanyeol insisted to do it alone but they didn't leave him a choice. Baekhyun wasn't fond of the idea and without any surprise, none of the chaebols proposed to stay and help.

Jongdae gets ready to leave when he sees the lovebirds smiling at each other. He gets his jacket and hurries to the entrance. “Baekhyun I'll wait for you in the car. If you stay here don't forget to tell me.”

He really needs to get a new best friend. Chanyeol is looking everywhere now but at Baekhyun and he finds it cute how they look like flustered teenagers at the mere mention of him sleeping here when in fact they already shared a bed together.

“Your friends...They look like they love you a lot.”

Chanyeol finally looks into Baekhyun's eyes. “Why do you say that ?"

He shrugs. “Well, they stole you away almost all night...The way they talk about you and when you all hugged it was heartwarming.”

Chanyeol grins. “I could see another side of them today and it made me really happy.”

Baekhyun mirrors the same expression. He snaps out of it though because he knows Jongdae will be waiting for him and he doesn't want to stay at Chanyeol's tonight. He doesn't want to make things even more awkward than they already are.

He takes the direction of the entrance and Chanyeol follows him, a bit disappointed by his upcoming departure but there's no rush. He keeps reminding himself that every moment counts and he can still plan another date soon.

He's been greedy, seeing Baekhyun two days in a row makes him want more.

Baekhyun turns around in the entrance, a soft smile plastered on his face. His eyeliner is smudged but Chanyeol finds him even prettier.

“I'm sorry again for not asking about your birth date.”

Chanyeol purses his lips and a cute dimple appears. Baekhyun grins at that. “I told you I don't care about my birthday.”

“Still, it's unfair that I didn't know, I couldn't spoil you.” He pouts and Chanyeol can't resist that.

“Spending time with you made my day you know...”

Baekhyun gets shy, he giggles and looks at his feet. When Chanyeol murmurs a thank you, he closes the distance and raises his head. He still can't get over the fact that he is so tall but he likes it a lot. He feels protected and shielded from everything. He reaches out for Chanyeol's hands, he likes the softness of his skin and how large they are. They both find themselves staring at their entwined fingers and how they fit well together. Chanyeol's chest is filled with warmth and his heart skips a beat when Baekhyun tip-toes to kiss him.

It's too fast and frustrating.

He's looking at Baekhyun without uttering a word, flabberghasted.

Baekhyun chuckles and once again, he closes up the gap between them. His hands craddle Chanyeol's face gently, he tilts his head and this time he takes his sweet time to shower Chanyeol with his soft kisses. He likes the feel of Chanyeol's plump lips against his, he loves how the taller responds with urgency but care at the same time.

He clings to him as their bodies stick together and Chanyeol moans in his mouth when their tongues meet.

This is maddening.

Unexpected.

A lasting kiss, Baekhyun traps his lower lip between his and he feels Chanyeol smile. He can feel his lustful gaze but he doesn't want to rush it.

Not yet.

“I don't know what to get you so consider this my birthday present.”

Chanyeol is beaming, he licks his lips and gently strokes Baekhyun's cheek. “This is the best birthday present ever.”

“You should really have higher standards.” They laugh together.

“You're worth more.”

Baekhyun doesn't like the butterfly in his stomach and how Chanyeol's smile sends him on cloud nine. He needs to get out and go home, take a cold shower and think thoroughfully about everything.

He's a bit scared by the way Chanyeol turned his life around.

The first time they kissed, it was Chanyeol who got away. Today it's Baekhyun's turn.

He puts on his shoes and shares a last smile for Chanyeol who's standing at the doorway, making sure Baekhyun gets on the elevator safely – which was unecessary but he insisted anyway – and he hears him say to text him when he's home just in time before the doors close.

 

Inside the elevator, Baekhyun can still feel the ghost of Chanyeol's lips on his.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The cinema scene was real, this was literally how I reacted to the movie Bohemian Rhapsody and it was the one who used to be my bestie who wiped my tears away. 
> 
> I hope you like this, I can already tell that there will be a sequel after chapter 3 :) 
> 
> A.

**Author's Note:**

> The title comes from that Arctic Monkeys song.  
> It's been sitting on my laptop for a while but only the first scene. It's a twoshot so it will end with the next chapter. (might make a sequel).  
> I didn't really want to focus on the drugs effects tbh besides I hate them. 
> 
> I used to post my work on AFF under the same username, I stopped writing around 2014, life got in the way. I do have unfinished work there, I still don't know if I'll go back to writing these stories. 
> 
> I don't feel 100% satisfied with what I wrote but if I don't share it now I might never again lol. 
> 
> Of course comments and kuddos if you liked it, I have more plots to come and I hope I won't disappoint.  
> Thank you <3


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